


Secret Love

by akanezora



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Humor, I keep added tag as I update, I'm Sorry, Liverpool Football Club, M/M, Slow Burn, and mixed signals, cursing, help me, like reaaally slow, lot of pining, see I keep added more character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-30
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2018-08-27 23:45:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 30,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8422273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akanezora/pseuds/akanezora
Summary: Adam and Jordan hate each other since they were children. Or so their friends think.“Watch where you going, you twat!”“Fuck off!”Chapter 9 : It Will Rain Update





	1. The Truth Revealed

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys.  
> It's my first attempt to write about Hendollana.  
> This idea was pop-up accidentally, so I try to write it out.  
> The inspirations are based on manga comic 'Love Arrow' and some Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter backgrounds.  
> There are a lot of swear words that I'm not sure about if it's English slang or American one.  
> English is not my first language, so feel free to correct me.  
> P.S. The college age in my country is about 18-22 years old, so my fic is based on that.  
> P.P.S the title was taken from Little Mix feat Jason Derulo song - Secret Love.  
> So, enjoy!
> 
> This fic has no relation whatsoever with the people mentions here. This is made for fun only.

“Watch where you going, you twat!”

“Fuck off!”

\---

James Milner shook his head as he watched his mate Jordan Henderson had a spat with the star runner Adam Lallana. It’s not even 9 in the morning. They usually insult each other at 10. What’s wrong today?

“Can you just stop for one day, Hendo?” James asked while they’re watching Lallana walked away.

Jordan looked at him funnily. “Stop what?”

“Stop harassing Lallana. Didn’t you guys best friend since you were little?”

Jordan scrunched his nose. “We’re enemies since we were little. Got your fact right, eh.”

“And what makes you become mortal enemy again? Oh right, this stuck up prince here was ignored by the peasant Adam Lallana, and he decided to make the poor boy’s life a hell.”

Jordan scoffed and James stared at him bemused. “That’s not right.”

“Pfft, that’s true. Don’t forget that I went to the same kindergarten with you two. Don’t think I forget the day Adam Lallana threw a mud to your face just because he didn’t want to play with you.” James bursted out laughing while Jordan glared at him.

“Shut up, mate.”

“Okay, I’ll shut up. But think about it -stop it, will you? It’s been more than ten years, let it go.” With that final words, James patted Jordan’s shoulder and walked away. Jordan watched him and starting to head to the opposite direction.

The thing is Jordan wanted to be friend with Adam Lallana. He wanted that since he was little. But it’s a little bit hard when the first sentences he said was insult for Adam’s friend. What’s his name again? Right, Jay Rodriguez. He didn’t mean to, he was just jealous seeing that beautiful boy laughing and playing with another boy. He realized he was wrong when Adam threw mud right to his face. The next mistake was Jordan didn’t apologize, he pushed Adam right into puddle of mud. So, disaster for the first meeting.

Jordan sighed and readjust his backpack. Since that first meeting in the kindergarten, he couldn’t get Adam out of his mind. He thought that he would forget Adam, eventually. But the world was cruel and he had no idea how he and Adam always end up at the same schools and now college. That’s ridiculous.

“Hendo, my boy! What’s with the long face, huh?” Daniel Sturridge asked him as soon as he sat in his chair.

“Nothing, Studge. Go bother someone else.”

“Aah, let me guess. It must have something to do with that crush of yours.”

“I do not have a crush, okay.”

“Yes, you have. You just have to ask him out, lad. He’s pretty, smart, charming, and you always spend your time bickering with him-”

“I do not have a crush on Lallana, Studge.”

Daniel faked a gasp. “I mean that Chemistry guy Toni. I thought you hate Adam.”

Fuck.

Jordan could feel the blood spreading his face and neck. In front of him, Daniel smirked gleefully and clapped his hands.

“Gotcha, Hendo. I always know that something deeper happens between you and Adam. Besides, I was joking. Toni already has that cute Colombian boy James.”

Jordan sighed. “There’s nothing between us, Studge.”

Daniel sat in front of Jordan and clasp his hands together. “But I am right. You have a crush on him.”

Jordan stared. Daniel stared back unwavering.

“Okay, right. I have a crush on him. Happy?”

Daniel tsked. “If you like him, why you insult him every time you see him. I don’t understand, lad.”

Jordan gave another painful sigh. “I don’t know how to talk to him, okay. He hates me since we’re children. I don’t know how to fix that.”

“Go apologize to him.”

“What?”

“Apologize. Have you ever done that?”

Silent. Daniel shook his head and stared at him with disappointment. “Go apologize, Hendo. It’s the first step.”

Jordan fidgeted. “What if he doesn’t forgive me?”

“We’ll talk about that later. Right now, you need to apologize.”

Jordan thought about that for a second and nodded his head. “Okay, I’ll try.”

Daniel chuckled and patted his shoulder. “My man. I’ll help you woo Adam, lad. It will be fun.”

“No, you don’t.”

“I will, and you can’t stop me.” Daniel said with finality. Jordan let out a painful sigh.

\---

Jordan cornered Adam in the deserted hall before lunch. It’s not the brightest idea, come to think of it. Adam glared at him as Jordan blocked his way and trapped him in the corner.

“Fuck off.”

“I need to talk to you.”

“Yeah, I don’t want to talk to you.” Adam tried to pass Jordan, but Jordan gripped his left arm. “Just listen to me, will ya?”

Adam shrugged his arm and glared at Jordan. “Fine. What do you want now?”

“I apologize.”

Silent. Adam stared at him with disbelief.

“What?”

“I apologize.”

“Can you please repeat that again?”

Jordan glared and gritted his teeth. “I apologize, you wanker.”

Adam scoffed. “What is it? A bet?”

“What? No, it isn’t. Didn’t you hear that I swallow my pride and apologize to you?”

“I don’t need your apologize, you daft. What do you want exactly?”

Jordan growled and gripped his hair, messed his perfectly haired gel. Adam stared at him bemusedly.

“Listen, twat. What I want is your forgiveness, okay. I apologize that I insulted your friend when we were children. I don’t mean that.”

Adam stared at him blankly and Jordan could feel his heart hammered.

“That’s it? You just apologize because you insulted Jay?”

“What?”

“How about when you pushed me into the mud?”

“Okay, that too.”

“And when you hide my shoes on the roof when we were thirteen?”

“That also.”

“And when you punched me in high school-“

“That was an accident!”

“Or when you tripped me the next day-“

“That also an accident!”

“Then when you sabotaged my experiment or when you-“

“Okay! Stop! I’ll apologize for every mistakes that I’ve done to you. There, are you happy?!”

“Ecstatic. Now, move your ass.” Adam tried to walk away, but Jordan put his hand on his chest. “Wait. Do you forgive me then?”

Adam seemed to be in the deep thought and after several seconds, he sighed and nodded. “I’m not going to forgive you right away. There’s so much to think of, but I will. Slowly.”

Jordan released a deep breath. “Okay, I can accept that.” With that, he released his hand on Adam’s chest. Adam still stared at him with distrust expression, and Jordan didn’t blame him for that. When Adam was walking towards the canteen, Jordan remembered something.

“Hey wanker! You’re not gonna apologize to me for throwing a mud at my face?!”

Adam stopped and turned slowly. “I’m not the one who wants forgiveness. And to be honest, I don’t regret that.” With that said, he smirked and continued walking, leaving Jordan stunned in his spot. “You prat.”

\---

Jordan pushed himself down on canteen’s chair with force. His friends around him staring at him like they were used to with his behavior. There were four of them; Lucas Leiva, James Milner, Daniel Sturridge, and Emre Can.

“What crawls up your ass and die now, mate?” Lucas asked with his unique accent. He was a ray of sunshine, that he was. Jordan sighed and sip James’ water while James frowned at him.

Daniel butted in. “Ah, you have apologized to Adam, right?”

All three of them looked at Daniel and then at Jordan with disbelief.

“Why did you apologize?” Emre asked curiously. “Because Studge asked me to.” Jordan grumbled.

Daniel shook his head. “No, lads. It’s because Hendo here has a crush on Adam.”

Silent.

“What?!”

“I thought you hated him?” Emre asked with disbelief with Lucas pipped in a high pitch ‘me too!’

James was the only one who grinning. “I knew it. I know that you were pulling his pigtails all this time.”

“No, I don’t.” Jordan said sourly.

“You are, Hendo. I saw the way you look at him, you know.”

“Why didn’t you say anything then?”

“Eh, it’s entertaining to watch you guys fight.” James grinned shamelessly and Jordan wanted to smacked his head for that.

“Yeah, yeah. Hendo here likes Adam, lads. Move on. How’s the apologize going?” Daniel asked excitedly. All of them suddenly watched Jordan with a lot of interest.

Jordan sighed and covered his face. “It’s not bad, it’s not good either. I apologized, he didn’t believe me, we threw insult at each other, and finally he said he would forgive me, eventually.”

They blinked their eyes several times and snorted. “How come you insult someone when you apologize to them?” Emre asked curiously.

“That happened when you love your mortal enemies, fella.” Lucas said and snickering with Emre a moment later. Jordan glared at them and gritted his teeth.

“It’s a good start, I think. Considering that Adam has been hated you for more than ten years.” James stated matter of fact. Daniel appeared in the deep thought and suddenly he clapped his hands. “That’s alright, Hendo. We just have to step up our next move, okay.”

“What do you have in mind, Studge?” James asked curiously.

“I’m thinking that our lad here should give Adam flowers.”

Emre snorted into his drink while Lucas giggling.

“You want me to what?”

“Give Adam flowers, Hendo.” Daniel said again. Jordan stared at him bemused, until James nodded his head. “It’s a good idea, actually.”

“What? No. Milly, you can’t be agree with Studge’s idea here. It’s crazy, mate.” Jordan protested and would try everything to cancel the plan.

“No, it’s a good idea. I hear that Adam likes flowers, and he grows some plants at his house.” James explained. Jordan stared at him with disbelief.

“You kidding.”

“No, I’m not. You know I’m not gonna lie to you, right?”

Daniel nodded his head and tsked. “I hear about it too, mate. You should give him flowers.”

Jordan frowned. “You really think I should?”

“That’s a good idea, actually. It’s kind of romantic.” Lucas pipped in. “You have to be careful though, every flower has a different meaning. You don’t want to accidentally give him the flower that means ‘go fuck yourself’ or something.” Emre added.

Hendo nodded and thought maybe it was a good idea. “What should I give him then, lads?”

They were shrugged. “Eh, dunno. Ask Adam’s friends what flowers that he likes.” Daniel suggested.

Jordan groaned. “I can’t ask his friends, they will tell him right away that I ask something like that.”

“You can ask someone to ask Adam what flower does he like.” Emre said. Jordan grinned and patted Emre’s head. “Perfect. I’ll go right away.” Then, Jordan got up and went hurriedly. All of his friends were watching him with amused expressions.

Studge smirked. “Who do you think the poor lad that he asks for help?”

\---

Alberto Moreno looked at Jordan like he was asking him to jump out of the roof.

“You want me to what?”

“Ask Adam what flower does he like.”

Alberto frowned. “We talked about señor Lallana, sí?”

“Yes, we talk about Adam Lallana, Alby.”

“You hate each other, no?” Alberto frowned and scrunched his nose. He looked like a confuse puppy, and Jordan restrained himself from patting his head.

“No, it’s a misunderstanding, Alby. We don’t hate each other.”

“Okay..”

“So, are we clear? Can you do it for me?” Jordan asked him eagerly. Alberto considered it for a moment and finally nodded. “Sí, I’ll do it.”

“Great! Thanks-“

“Not so fast. I want a payment.”

Jordan stopped himself from smacking Alberto’s head and groaned. “Fine, what do you want?”

“Information, sí.”

“About what?”

“Your friend, Emre Can, sí?”

“Emre. You want information about Emre?” Jordan asked with disbelief. Alberto nodded his head enthusiastically. “Sí.”

“For what? If I may ask.”

“You see, Bobby and I know that our friend Couti has a crush on your friend, Can. So, we want to know anything about him so we can decide if he is good enough for Couti or not.”

Jordan considering if it’s morally wrong to sell your friend for his own benefit. After several moment, he decided that Emre should thank him if he and Couti become a couple someday. He kinds of remember that Emre have said that there was a cute Brazilian student, and Jordan was sure Emre talked about Coutinho.

“Deal. I’ll exchange the information as soon as you tell me about Adam’s favorite flowers.”

“Deal.” Alberto grinned and went away.

Oh boy, Jordan couldn’t wait for this.

\---

 


	2. You Know I'm a Mess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Move, Lallana.”
> 
> Adam was standing rigidly, but he didn’t flinch at Jordan’s harsh words. “Why are you doing this to me?” He asked softly.
> 
> Jordan frowned. “What?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for everyone who reads, kudos, comments this fic.  
> I love you all.  
> I'm sorry it took so long.
> 
> This fic has no relation whatsoever with the people mentions here. This is made for fun only.  
> Enjoy.

Adam Lallana frowned as he stared at his untouch lunch. Next to him, Eric Dier elbowed Dele Alli and made a hand gesture towards Adam. Dele frowned and decided to ask. “Are you okay, Ads?”

There’s no answer.

Eric decided to throw a paper bag right into Adam’s face.

“Oi, mate. What the fuck?!”

Eric grinned and high five Dele. They grinned at him while Adam was pouting.

“You alright? You seem out of your mind.” Eric asked. Adam sighed and now playing with his lunch. “I have a weird day.”

“What kind of weird? Alien-weird or _deja vu_ weird?” asked Dele as he stole fries from Eric’s plate. Eric swatted his hand away and smacked his head for good measure.

“It’s related with Henderson.”

“Oh wow, I’m not even surprised. Whenever you are in your bitchy mood, it’s connected with Hendo.” Eric said bluntly. Now, Dele was the one who smacked his head. “Stop with your sarcasm. Ads here need our help.”

Adam looked at them fondly, but frowned when he realized that Eric just called Jordan fucking Henderson’s nickname. “What did you call him?”

Eric looked at Adam like he was insane. “Hendo?”

“Why the fuck do you call him ‘Hendo’?”

“Ehm, because it’s his name?” Eric asked back with a confused expression.

“It’s not his name. It’s his fucking nickname!” Adam shouted and the whole cafetaria started to look towards their table.

Dele starting to think that Ads was indeed went mad. “What’s wrong with his nickname, Ads?”

“I didn’t know that you guys are friend with him!”

They looked at Adam as he went ballistic. It’s always like this with him. Adam could have a best day and one mention of Jordan’s name and the happy feeling were gone. Eric and Dele knew Adam had a long history with Jordan, but it’s been what? 10 years? They thought Adam should let it go.

“Calm down, mate. Of course we are friend. We know Studge, and Studge knows Hendo. You know..” Eric trailed. “It’s a friend of my friend thing.” Dele continued.

Adam stared at them with sour look and sighed. “Why my world revolves around him?!”

“What did Hendo do now?” Dele asked patiently. “And for your information, it doesn’t.” Eric said.

Adam titled his head. “Doesn’t what?” Eric let out a long suffering sigh and started explaining. “Your world doesn’t revolve around him. It’s your fault in the first place.”

Adam gave him undignified look. “Excuse me?”

“I know Hendo was taunting you since you guys were child, but you don’t have to taunt him back. It wouldn’t get this far if someone grew up and decided to end this enemy things.”

Adam couldn’t help but remember the way Jordan acted and apologized to him. Did Jordan fucking Henderson really grow up and decided to end this thing between them. Did Adam want this to end?

Adam was startled when Dele poked him in the ribs and whining. “Come on, tell us what Hendo did. I really want to know I’m literally dying here.”

Eric looked at Dele fondly and shook his head. Sometimes moment like this made Adam want to scream ‘you’re so gaaay for each other!’ and sing song about them kissing in the tree but Adam restrained himself. Barely. He shifted his thought to his arc enemy again.

“It’s just, I met Henderson in the hall way before.”

“And? You usually insult each other, that’s not new. What’s so weird about it? I mean-“

“Shut up, Dele. We didn’t. He apologized to me, okay.”

Both Eric and Dele looked stunned.

“See? I couldn’t believe it either. I mean, we dislike each other since long ago. Why the sudden change of heart?”

“What did you do?” Eric asked.

“I walked away?”

“No, when he apologized, did you forgive him?”

“No. I said I will, slowly.”

Eric groaned and Dele looked at Adam with pity.

“What? Do you guys know something I don’t. It’s probably-“

“Señor Lallana?”

Adam ranted was cut off when someone approaching their table. That someone turned out to be Alberto Moreno. The Spanish lad that looked like Professor Gerrard and Professor Alonso. Adam thought that it’s incredible.

“Hey, Alby. Come on sit down. And stop calling me señor Lallana. I thought I told you to call me Ads.” Adam grinned. Alberto sat down and grinned back. He was so adorable that Adam wanted to squish him.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Chill lad, you can ask me anything.”

“As long as it’s not his relationship with Hendo, you’ll be fine Alby.” Eric chirped in. Dele snorted while Adam glared at him. “Shut up, you wanker.” Alberto fidgeted in his seat and smiled sheepishly.

“What do you want to ask?”

“Oh, if I like someone, and I want to give that someone a flower, what flower should I give?”

Adam stared at him blankly while Dele and Eric giggled. Alberto started to sweat.

“What did you ask me this, Alby?” Adam asked confused. “No reason?”

Adam looked at him thoughtfully and decided to help the poor lad. “May I know if it’s a girl or a boy?”

“Ehm, it’s a boy?”

“Why you said it like it was a question. Are you not sure about it?”

Alberto blushed while Eric and Dele laughed and leaned at each other. Adam looked at them with disapprove and decided to revise his question. “I’m sorry Alby, I don’t mean it like it is offensive or something. I’m just confused, I think.”

If it was possible, Alberto blushed harder. “So, what flower?”

Adam smiled warmly and chuckled. “I think you should give him a yellow chrysanthemum.”

Alberto titled his head. “A yellow chrysanthemum?” Adam nodded. “It means ‘precious one’”

Alberto’s face lit up and he clapped his hands excitedly. “So, I have to give a yellow chrysanthemum, sí?”

Adam nodded eagerly. “You should, lad.”

“Gracias, señor!” With that, Alberto practically ran, ignoring the disbelief look on Adam’s face.

“Wow, I never know that you are such a romantic man, Adam.” Eric teased.

“You should give me a yellow chrysanthemum, Diet.” Dele said. “Of course Delboy. Because you’re the ‘precious one’”

Eric and Dele giggled while Adam glared at him. “Stop mocking me.” They laughed louder.

\---

Alberto swore that he would think million times if someone asked him to do something weird again. It’s embarrassing to ask señor Lallana something like that, and it’s not even for him. Well, Philippe better be grateful. Alberto went towards the library and stopped when he saw señor Henderson waiting for him in the hall.

“You got that, lad?”

“Sí, you should give him a yellow chrysanthemum.”

“What?” Jordan looked at him pointedly. Alberto nodded his head excitedly. “It’s the flower that he likes.”

“He likes a yellow chrysanthemum?” Jordan asked sceptically.

“Sí. He said it means the precious one.”

Jordan raised his eyebrows, he didn’t know that Adam was such a sap. In front of him, Alberto looked at him with his puppy eyes.

“What?”

“My payment, sí.”

Jordan nodded his head. “Right. I don’t know why your friend likes Emre. He is a little shit that makes my life miserable with his sarcasm and his blunt words, even when I refused to hear it. But, a deal is a deal, right?”

“Sí. Besides, I have no idea why Couti likes him either.”

“Tell you what, come join our table tomorrow. I will arrange it so your friend and Emre can talk.”

Alberto was beaming and nodded his head. “Sí, I will. Gracias.”

Jordan clapped his shoulder. “You’re welcome, lad. It’s nice to have a business with you. See you tomorrow.”

With that, Jordan sauntered away and started thinking where the hell he can get a yellow chrysanthemum.

\---

The next day, Jordan came to the campus at the crack of dawn and left three stems of yellow chrysanthemum in Adam’s locker. He thought about leaving a note, but decided against it. He fear that Adam would throw the flowers away if he knew it was from him. He just hope he can start over with Adam Lallana.

\---

Adam opened his locker and stunned when he saw the yellow chrysanthemum. Who gave him these? Could it be.. Alberto? Did someone Alberto like was him? It would explain his weird behavior yesterday, what with asking what flower should he gave and the vague answer for whom. Adam picked the flowers and smiled softly. Adam’s feeling towards Alberto was no more than brother, but it’s so sweet of him to give Adam’s favorite flowers. He should apologize and thank him later.

\---

Today was a good day for Alberto. Today he would make Philippe talked with his crush and he couldn’t wait for it. He basically dragged a very reluctant Philippe towards Emre’s table with Firmino tailing closely behind them. Lucas saw them first and waved his hand excitedly.

“Hello, my friends! Do you want to join us?”

“Sí, if it’s not a bother.” Alberto said. Lucas waved him off. “Of course not. See, we have a lot of seat here.”

“Right, lads. Don’t hesitated to join our cool group here. Except I’m the only one who cool enough for the whole group.” Studge said as he stood up and directed they where to sit.

“Alby here could sit beside Lucas, Bobby can sit beside my amazing self, and Couti-“

“He can sit next to Emre.” Jordan interrupted. Studge raised his eyebrows when he saw the determination look on Jordan’s face. The realization dawned on him and he smirked. “Right, our cute little Coutinho could sit next to Emre.”

Philippe blushed and tried to make himself out of this situation. “Em, I think I have to go, um..to the library.”

“Nonsense. It’s lunch time. You can go later. Here, sit next to the pompous git Can.” Studge practically shoved him next to Emre. Having lost his balance, Philippe slammed his face to Emre’s shoulder. Emre caught him out of reflex. “Wow, easy Studge. Are you okay?” Emre asked.

Philippe felt mortified as he realized that Emre’s hands were on his shoulder to balance him. “Um, I’m okay.” Except that he felt far from okay.

“Sorry, Studge can be overwhelming sometimes.” Emre said softly. Philippe just nodded, didn’t trust his voice to speak. Emre’s hands felt burned on his shoulder. When Emre detached his shoulder, Phillipe mourned the loss of warm. But he felt he can breath easier.

“You’re Philippe Coutinho, right?” Emre asked again. Philippe breath hitched and he struggled to answer. “Sí. I mean yes. Um.”

Emre chuckled. “It’s okay. You can speak with whatever language. I’m German myself.”

Philippe almost blurted ‘I Know!’ but he bit his tongue in time. He smiled shyly and bow his head. Philippe didn’t see the struck look and open admiration on Emre’s face.

Emre cleared his throat. “You know, I always want to learn Portuguese. So, maybe you can teach me? I can teach you German if you want to.”

Philippe looked at him so fast and looked stunned. “You want to?”

“Yeah, maybe you can teach me. Then we can learn about British slang together.”

Philippe was beaming and he smiled. “I’d love to.” Next to him, Emre’s heart beat million times faster. “Good”

Studge interrupting the moment with a cough that sounds a lot like ‘smart move’. Both Philippe and Emre blushed when they realized all of their friends were silent and watched them intently. They were all smirked, and Emre wanted to punch all of them.

“Hey, Alby? Can I talk to you for a second?” All of them turned their heads and met with a cool stare from Adam Lallana. Jordan heart skipped a beat, but he composure himself to look indifferent.

Alberto nodded and made a gesture to get up when Jordan interrupted him. “Can’t you see that Alby here is having lunch?”

Adam gritted his teeth and glared at Jordan. “Yes, I see. It wouldn’t take long.”

“You can say whatever you want to say here.” Jordan continued. “It’s none of your business.”

“What? Scared that I will mock you?” Besides him, Milly elbowed Jordan to make him stop talking. But it’s too late. Adam was already irked. “Fine, you want to hear it, don’t you. Alby, thank you so much for the flowers, I really appreciate it. Thank you so much for not being a jerk like someone here who apologize yesterday and back to irritate me the next day. Sorry for interrupting your lunch.” With that, Adam walked away, leaving them all shocked. Jordan went pale, grabbed his bag, and walked to the opposite direction.

Firmino was the one who broke the silence. “What was that?”

“Fuck.” Alberto cursed without realizing it. “What does Ads mean with flowers, Alby?” Milly asked. All of them focusing their attention towards Alberto.

“Señor Hendo asked me to ask señor Adam what flowers does he like, but I think there’s a misunderstanding.”

“Adam thought you’re the one who gave him flowers.” Lucas concluded. “What?! How come Ads thought it was you?” Studge asked loudly.

Alberto frowned. “I think I was wrong when I phrase the question.”

“How do you ask anyway?” Roberto frowned.

Alberto frowned. “Oh, God. I asked him hypothetically. I asked if I wanted to give a someone a flower, what did I choose.”

“That’s why Ads thought like that.” Lucas mused. “It’s not helping that Hendo taunted him.” Milly added.

“That blasted idiot. Why is Hendo couldn’t control his emotion when it came to Adam?!” Studge ranted.

“I have to explain it to señor Lallana.” Alberto got up and ran towards Adam’s direction. All that remained on the table wishing him luck.

\---

Alberto found Adam on the bleacher in front of the running track. Adam looked hurt and confused. He hugged himself and stared straight at to the running track.

“Señor Lallana?”

Adam scoffed. “I told you to call me Ads.”

Alberto sat beside him and tried to rearrange his words carefully. It would be a mess if this misunderstanding wasn’t clear up right now.

“I’m sorry, Alby.”

Alberto frowned. “For what?”

“That I talk to you about the flowers in front of other people.”

Alberto cleared his throat and fidgeted. “Sí, about that..”

“Do you like me?”

“Sí, I like you.” Alberto blurted. He cursed himself moment later because it sounds that he had a romantic feeling towards Adam. “I mean, not it the romantic way.”

Adam turned his head and raised his eyebrows. “Oh?”

“Sí, I like you because you’re a good person, señor. But the flowers are not from me.”

Adam frowned. “It’s not from you?”

Alberto nodded his head. “It’s just that.. ehm.. it’s just..”

“You can tell me, Alby. It’s okay.”

“Someone asked me to ask you what flower do you like.” Alberto blurted out.

“Who?”

Alberto gulped and fidgeted. He can’t say Jordan’s name, can he?

“Please, Alby. Tell me. I’m a mess right now.” Adam pleaded softly. Alberto felt sad seeing the usually cheerful man looked so confused and decided to tell the truth. He prayed that he didn’t make matters worse.

“It’s señor Hendo.”

\---

Jordan was walking towards his locker. He skipped class and went to the woods behind the school until all classes were over to avoid people. He was shocked that Adam thought the flowers were from Alberto. He was also hurt when Adam thought he was a jerk. To be honest, he knew it’s his fault in the first place. He did apologize to Adam. And he did make the same mistake again and again. The truth was Jordan was helpless when it came to Adam. He felt like he didn’t have power over his mind. He was a fucking mess.

Jordan’s step faltered when he saw Adam leaning over his locker. Adam looked at him sharply and Jordan felt himself crumbling.

“Move, Lallana.”

Adam was standing rigidly, but he didn’t flinch at Jordan’s harsh words. “Why are you doing this to me?” He asked softly.

Jordan frowned. “What?”

“Why did you send me those flowers?!” Adam tone got higher as he walked and close the distance between him and Jordan.

Jordan stared back at him blankly. Now, there’s just inches apart between him and Adam.

“Why are you playing with my feeling like this?!” Adam shouted.

Jordan tried to be calm when he saw Adam like this. “I’m not.”

“What?”

“I’m not playing with your feeling.”

“Bullshit. Why did you send me those though? To mock me? You don’t know that those flowers would mean a lot to me, do you? You want to see me fall apart? Fine! But your trick was low, even for you, Hender-“

Adam couldn’t finish his sentences as he was slammed against the locker. Adam breath hitched as he felt his back hurts. His eyes widen as he felt Jordan hands trapped him to the locker. Jordan looked hurt, his shoulders tense, and he looked like he tried so hard not to punch Adam.

“Listen, you wanker. I’m not playing with your feeling. I’m sorry if it’s hurt you, but it’s not my intention.”

It felt like all the anger was drained from Adam. He sagged as he stared at Jordan with a cross between confusion and hurt.

“So why are you doing this? What’s the meaning of this? Explain to me.” He pleaded.

Jordan felt his heart was stabbed seeing Adam like this. Was Adam think he was that cruel?

“I don’t know what to do about you. I hate you because you always in my mind since forever. I don’t know what I should do to stop this torture. I’m powerless. But it doesn’t matter, right? Everything that I do will feel like a trick to you. Damn it!”

Jordan punched the locker right next to Adam left side. Adam startled and stunned as he saw Jordan took his bag and walked away. He was standing still and tried to remember everything that Jordan said before.

_It can’t be that he likes me, right?_

Adam touched his chest and thought why it felt like his heart was ripped apart when he saw Jordan walked away?

\---

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was it? Feel free to comment, kudos, or contact me  
> I'm up for chat about anything, really. :)
> 
> Thank you for reading. :)


	3. Here Without You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Xabi chuckled. “Adam talked to me that he has a problem with Jordan. Guess what?”  
> “What?”  
> “You wouldn’t believe me.”  
> “What? Xabs, come on, what?”  
> “Apparently, Jordan likes Adam after all this time.”  
> Stevie looked at Xabi like he’s going mental. “No way.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really loooovee all of you who read, comment, or give me kudos.  
> All of you give me my inspiration and spirit to write this fic.  
> So here chapter 3.  
> The chapter's title was taken from 3 Doors Down - Here Without You
> 
> This fic has no relation whatsoever with the people mentions here. This is made for fun only.  
> Enjoy.

Adam felt his heart hammering in his chest. He walked towards his class slowly. His head was spinning and he felt that he was going to be sick. Last night he couldn’t sleep because he thought about what’s happening between him and Jordan over and over. Was Jordan really like him? It felt like a cruel joke. They had been enemies for so long. Was Adam so blind that he failed to see who Jordan really was? Their relationship was easy before all of this. They would insult each other, sometimes it got physical, but that was it. Adam always knew where he stood, but now he’s not so sure anymore.

This morning he saw Jordan walked towards him in the hall. Adam was ready for another banter, but Jordan Henderson had ignored him. He didn’t even react when Adam stood in his way. He had the blank mask on his face and walked away, leaving Adam rooted in his spot. Adam felt like a cold water was poured over his body. He tried to calm his nerves and moved on.

He failed. Mr. Alonso saw right through his mask and asked him to stay after class. Now, Adam fidgeted in his seat while Mr. Alonso looked at him with concern. “Are you alright, Adam?”

“I’m fine, Sir.”

Xabi chuckled. “You can call me Xabi, Adam. You don’t have to be so formal.”

Adam blushed and smiled sheepishly. He always felt nervous every time he talked with Mr. Alonso. The man gave a strong aura, and Adam wasn’t even sure what’s the meaning of that.

Xabi cleared his throat and decided to ask again. “What happens, Adam? You seems distracted.”

Adam swallowed and decided to tell Mr. Alonso. Maybe he can help saw the light. “It’s just.. Sir, you know Henderson, right?”

“Hendo? Yes, I know him.” Xabi answered carefully. He knew that Adam and Jordan shared a long history. He was sure all the professor knew about both of them.

“I don’t know where do I start.” Adam said helplessly. He looked like a confused puppy and Xabi felt his concern was growing. “It’s okay, Adam. Take your time.”

Adam took a deep breath. “I think he hates me for sure now.”

Xabi raised his eyebrows. “Hate is such a strong word. I don’t think he hates you, Adam. I know you guys are childhood enemies, but I don’t think it reaches the hate level.”

“It’s not because we’re enemies.”

“Oh?”

“Two days ago he apologized for all his mistakes to me, and I shrugged it off. Yesterday he gave me my favorite flowers, and I accused him tricking me. I..”

Xabi waited Adam to finish his story, he knew that Adam tried to composure himself, and he would wait for the boy.

Adam played with his fingers as he continued his story. “He.. He hinted that he likes me after all this time. He.. I think- I see that he is hurt because of me. He ignored me this morning, when we saw each other. I don’t understand this. How come he likes me after all this time? How am I supposed to react? Why I feel hollow when my enemy becomes stranger?”

Adam was so distraught that Xabi had to call his name several times. “Adam. Adam, listen to me. Hey, Adam.”

Adam tried to focus his attention and calm his nerves. Mr. Alonso looked at him and smiled softly. “It’s gonna be okay, Adam.”

“How do you know, Sir?”

“I just know.” Xabi smiled and startled when the door was opened out of sudden. “Xabs, let’s go have lunch! Oh, hey Ads.”

Adam saw Mr. Alonso’s face lit up when he saw Mr. Gerrard and he felt warm. Mr. Alonso and Mr. Gerrard had been dancing around each other long enough that Mr. Carragher was sick of it and decided to lock them in his office for a full day. It paid off as they were together until now.

“Hey, Ads. Whatcha doing here?” Mr. Gerrard asked as he closed the door and sat facing Adam on the table. Adam smiled and shook his head. “Nothing, sir. I’ll go for lunch. Have a nice day. Thank you again, Mr. Alonso.” With that, Adam took his bag and went out of the classroom. Steven Gerrard watched Adam walked away and turned his attention to Xabi. He frowned when he saw that Xabi seemed in a deep thought.

“Penny for your thought?” Stevie nudged Xabi shoulder and his lover seemed to frowned harder. “Hey, Stevie, Jordan is in your class, right?”

“Umm, yeah. He is.”

“And you know his relationship with Adam, right?”

“Yeah. They like Carra and Neville, and I can’t decide who’s worse.”

Xabi chuckled. “Adam talked to me that he has a problem with Jordan. Guess what?”

“What?”

“You wouldn’t believe me.”

“What? Xabs, come on, what?”

“Apparently, Jordan likes Adam after all this time.”

Stevie looked at Xabi like he’s going mental. “No way.”

“Yes way.”

“You fucking with me.”

“I’m not.”

“But- but, they hate each other!”

Xabi rolled his eyes. “They’re not, love. Adam just told me.”

“You have to tell me all about it, mate.” Stevie sat in front of Xabi and pleaded with his eyes to hurry up. Xabi began to tell everything about Adam and Jordan. Stevie listened intently and sometimes added a shocked gasp, or nodded his head. In the end, Stevie had a determined look on his face. “We must help them, Xabs.”

“How? Jordan’s not in my class, and Adam isn’t in yours. We can’t force them to talk, or something, Stevie.”

Stevie grinned. “You’re right, love. But, I know someone that could help them.”

Light bulb went on in Xabi's head, “Carra.”

\---

Adam was a man on a mission. He walked around campus with the purpose of finding Jordan Henderson. Adam decided that he would apologize and try to befriend with the sandy haired man. So far, he hadn’t met with his target yet. He frowned and decided to check to the cafetaria. He cursed himself for not thinking to go there first. Jordan and his friends usually hang around the cafetaria whenever they do not have class. Adam knew this because it’s a good habit to keep tab on your enemy. Or whatever Adam told himself.

He focused his attention on the table that usually occupied by Jordan and felt himself disappointed. There’s no sight of Jordan. He saw Studge and Milly though, and decided to ask them.

“Hey, lads. Ehm, where’s Henderson?” Adam asked awkwardly and felt himself shrinking under their scrutinized gaze.

“You’re asking for Hendo.” Studge said matter of fact. Adam was blushing and cleared his throat. “Yes, I am.”

“He’s on his way to Sunderland.” Studge stated. Adam turned his attention towards Studge so fast and his eyes widened. “He goes to Sunderland?”

“Yeah, he has to- Ouch!”

“He said maybe it’s his time to come back to his hometown.” Milly added. Adam was stunned and he didn’t realize that Studge half glare-half frown at Milly while Milly looked at Studge with a look that said just-shut-up-and-trust-me-on-this.

“But I met him this morning..” Adam said with disbelief. “He came to say goodbye. He left as soon as he met everyone.” Milly continued with the most neutral expression on his face. Studge looked at him with disbelief and changed his expression to sad as soon as Adam turned his attention towards him. “Is that true?”

Studge felt pity as he saw Adam looked so crestfallen. “Sit down first, Ads. You looked like you’re going to faint.”

Adam sat down on autopilot and stared dejectedly at both Studge and Milly. “Is it because of me?” He asked softly. Milly shook his head. “It’s not, Adam. Maybe you’re relationship with Hendo is getting more complicated, but it’s not about what happened yesterday. Hendo always planning to come back to Sunderland someday, and he thought that it was the right time.”

Adam shook his head. “Will he come back, though? He will, right?”

Milly sighed and gave an apologetic look. “We don’t know, I’m sorry, Ads.”

Adam bit his lip and squezzed his hands. “There’s a chance that I’m not gonna see him again?”

Milly shook his head and Studge looked at him with pity. “Sorry, Ads.”

“Thanks, lads.” Adam got up and forced a smile. He felt boneless and his heart ache so much. Milly and Studge gave him a sympathetic looks.

As soon as Adam was out of sight, Studge looked at Milly with disbelief. “Why did you lie about Hendo?”

Milly shrugged. “It may be a good idea to make Ads and Hendo reconcile, Studge.”

“What? Hendo goes to Sunderland for a week because his aunt getting maried! And you stepped on my foot, Milner.”

“Yeah, sorry for that. Think about it, Studge. Look how Adam is so dejected. I wouldn’t be like that if my enemy go away.”

Studge frowned. “I may be understand what you’re into. Continue, Millly.”

“We will see how Adam cope for a week. I feel that there would be a hope for both of them. We just have to inform everybody not to tell Ads the truth.”

“Hm, this may be useful.”

“I know that you would agree to this.”

“Hm, better tell Hendo to bring us gift when he comes back.”

Milly grinned.

\---

Jordan frowned when he opened his phone and saw Studge’s chat. Why the fuck he should give him a gift for?

“Fucking imbecile.” Jordan muttered and decided to ignore it. He was on his way to Sunderland by train because he wanted to clear his mind, and sitting still on the train for almost four hours seemed like a good idea.

Jordan sighed and looked out the window. He felt tired as if he ran in the same place again and again. When his aunt Mary called him and asked him if he could go to Sunderland for her wedding, Jordan said yes immediately. He felt like going somewhere far away would help him mend his broken heart.

Jordan scoffed. As if it could be called a broken heart. He’s not even saying anything about his feeling, not directly. Adam clearly rejected him though. Jordan was so sure of that, and he only offered a gift for peace, for a new start. Sadly, it’s not going well.

 _Well, that’s an understatement,_ Jordan thought bitterly.

He realized that his relationship with Adam wouldn’t change no matter what he did. The other boy will always question his motive, and Jordan was sick of it. He should fucking know that once enemy always enemy. He felt foolish for thinking that he and Adam could become friend someday, or something more in the meantime. It fucking hurts, and now he would try everything to forget Adam. His ridiculous fashion sense, his smile when he talked to his friends, his furrowed eyebrows when he confused, his smirk when he won an argument over Jordan, the determination in his eyes when he protect other people, and-

Damn, Jordan knew he was screwed. He sighed and hoped that a week in his aunt house can help him forget all about Adam.

\---

Adam sat under the bleacher and stared blankly at his hands. He felt a lot of emotions at the same time. Confused, worry, sad, shocked, and... guilt. Adam hugged himself and tried to calm his heart. There’s a lot of questions in his head and didn’t know where he would find the answer, or to whom.

Why his world seemed to be out of his control out of sudden? How come Jordan likes him after all this time? Why he left Liverpool so abruptly? Is it because of him, because of his accusation to the younger boy? Why his heart ached and feel empty? Is he really would never meet the other boy again?

Adam bit his lip and thought about Jordan before this mess happened. He dislike Jordan the moment he said rude things to Jay. Jay was his friend since he could remember, and Jordan acted like a jerk. But Jay came back to Southampton five years later, and Jordan was someone who has a big part in Adam’s life since then. His relationship with Jordan had always been intense. Yes, they insulted each other almost daily, and sometimes it got physical between them. But Jordan was kind of Adam’s safe heaven, believe it or not. He didn’t have to pretend to be happy all the time in front of Jordan. Whenever he felt like he was stressed out, he seek Jordan to release the tension inside him. He didn’t have to watch his words around Jordan. Jordan could take it, he could absorb Adam’s anger. He always could. He could see right through Adam.

Jordan was strong and had a calm personality, Adam always admired that traits in Jordan’s. Seeing him snapped and lost his calm yesterday was disorientating for Adam. It felt like Jordan was give up on him. Like he could see that after all this time, Adam wasn’t worth it. Fuck, how would his life turn out now that he lost the steady presence of Jordan?

Adam was startled when he realized that Jordan had such a big role in his life. He dug his nails into his arms and bit his lip until it’s bleeding.

\---

Jordan was standing in his black tuxedo and watched his aunt getting married. He felt happy for his aunt, but he also felt jealous. Aunt Mary looked so happy standing beside her loved ones, and Jordan couldn’t help but think why he couldn’t be like that? He sighed and shook his head when Adam’s face appeared on his mind. Bloody hell, so much for trying to forget your childhood enemy.

Jordan was so focused on his thought that he didn’t realized aunt Mary was approaching him. “Hendo? What’s with the sullen face?”

Jordan startled and gave his aunt a sheepish smile. “Nothing. Congratulations, and you look very beautiful.”

Aunt Mary laughed and smacked his shoulder. “Oh, you. Thanks for coming, Hendo. It means a lot to me. I know you’re in the middle of the semester, but you still come.”

Jordan grinned and shook his head. “Anything for you.” Aunt Mary chuckled and looked at him fondly. “Someone would be very lucky to have you.”

Jordan grinned faltered and Aunt Mary noticed that immediately. “What’s wrong?”

Jordan forced a smile. “Nothing.” Aunt Mary frowned and dragged him to the empty chairs. “Talk to me.”

“It’s nothing, really-“

“Don’t fucking lie to me, Hendo.” Aunt Mary gave him a stern glare and Jordan sighed. “It’s just, I have some problem with someone.”

“Why? What problem?”

“It’s complicated.”

“With whom? Your girlfriend, boyfriend, or-“

“My enemy.”

“What? Adam?”

Jordan jaws dropped and he looked at his aunt with disbelief. “How come you know Adam?”

Aunt Mary smirked. “I remember that when you were little, you always talk to me about ‘Adam this’ and ‘Adam that’. You may be not remember that, but I remember clearly that you spent almost a full day just to rant about a boy named Adam. I thought it was cute. I don’t know that it’s still going on until now. Lucky guess, I think.”

Jordan eyes widened and he shook his head. “It doesn’t matter anymore. We’re nothing now, not even enemy.”

“Let me guess, you fall in love, right?”

Jordan groaned. “How come you know that?”

“I don’t. It’s just your life is like a soap opera. It’s not hard to predict it.”

“Oh yeah? What’s mu future then?”

“You will sort out your problem with Adam, be a disgustingly cute couple, and live happily ever after.”

Jordan scoffed. “No fucking way.”

“Really? Wanna bet? I see you maybe a year later come to me with Adam at your side, and tell me that I am right, and you are wrong.”

“You wouldn’t win that bet.”

“Ooh but I will.”

“Bloody hell, just go to your lover and stop tormenting me.” Jordan protested. Aunt Mary shot him a determined look and ruffled his hair. Jordan swat her hand away and she chuckled. “Everything will be alright, Hendo. See you later.”

 _Me and Adam become a couple? As if._ Jordan scoffed.

\---

A week had passed and Adam gave a long suffering sigh. He was sure he moved on autopilot since he knew that news. He skipped a lot of his class this week and felt like he didn’t want to do anything, at all. He avoided people because he would snap in his current state, and he didn’t want to do or say anything that he would regret later. He skipped his morning class today, but he decided to have lunch with Dele and Eric. He knew that they worried about him, and he kinda missed an interaction with other people. Who knows, maybe they could take his mind off of Jordan fucking Henderson.

Adam walked into the cafetaria slowly and felt his eyes bulged out. There’s no way that Jordan sitting with his group right now. His mind must be trick him. Adam pinched himself and the sight of Jordan didn’t disappear from his eyes. “What the hell?”

Adam almost ran to reach Jordan and he felt out of breath as he standing in front of him right now. “You came back?!”

Jordan turned his head and frowned as he saw Adam. “The fuck? Of course I come back, you wanker. What? You don’t want to see me? Just fuck off.”

Adam shook his head. “No, I heard you come back to Sunderland.”

“I went to Sunderland.”

“Why? They told me you left and never came back.”

“I went to my aunt’s wedding. Who the fuck tell you that?”

“Studge and Milly!” Adam shouted. Jordan turned his attention towards Studge and Milly. The people mentioned was trying to look innocent and give Jordan their very best we-had-no-idea-what’s-this-about faces.

“You lied to me!” Adam was beyond hysterical right now, and Jordan was confused between tried to calm Adam and asked his friends what’s going on.

“Ads, calm down.” Milly advised. Adam’s face was red and he felt like a volcano. An almost erupted volcano. “No, I don’t want to calm bloody down! You guys told me he left and never came back. Why? Do you think that I would go celebrate it or something?! I was depressed! I was a fucking mess, and I almost skipped all of my class for nothing? Thanks a lot for that.”

Adam walked away as soon as he said that, but his dramatic exit was a little bit ruined when he bumped into the table near the door and stumbled a little bit. Jordan, and pretty much the whole cafetaria, was left stunned.

“What happens with him?” Jordan finally found his voice and looked at the guilty faces of Studge and Milly.

“Milly here was lying to Adam and said that you went to Sunderland for good.” Studge piped in. “Wow, Studge. Way to throw someone under the bus.” Milly glared and Studge just shrugged.

“Why did you say that?”

“We wanted to know how Adam would react. We didn’t know that he would be depressed.” Milly explained.

“Why was he depressed?” Jordan asked aloud. Milly shrugged and Studge whistled. “Damn if I know. You should ask him that yourself.”

Jordan furrowed his eyebrows and grabbed his bag. “Eh, better ask him sooner.”

“Wait, bring him sandwich. You see how he stumbled on his way out.” Milly advised. Jordan nodded and took a sandwich from a buffet and wrapped it with a napkin. Milly smirked as he saw Jordan went away. “I think we know how Adam feel after all.”

Studge chuckled and gave Milly a high five.

\---

Adam sat under the bleacher and leaned his head against the wall. He closed his eyes and breathe slowly. He felt angry and hurt that they lied to him, but he also felt relief. Jordan was here, that’s the only thing matters right now. A week thinking that he would never see that boy again was a total agony. Adam could tell that someone was approaching him, but he didn’t even have an energy to open his eyes. “Leave me alone.”

“Gladly. But I have something to ask, so you just have to deal with me being here.”

Adam’s eyes snapped open as he heard the familiar voice. There he was, Jordan fucking Henderson standing beside him. Adam cleared his throat and felt himself blushing. He tried to speak, but no words come out of his mouth. He was gaping like a fish until Jordan took pity on him and sat beside him. Jordan gave him something on a napkin. “Here.”

“What’s this?”

“A sandwich.”

“I’m not hungry.” Adam protested. Jordan took a look at him and scoffed. “Please, I think the whole cafetaria saw the way you crash into the table and stumbled on your way out.”

Adam felt the blush came back in full force and kept the sandwich in his lap. “Thanks.”

Jordan gave an affirmative noise. Adam opened the napkin and took a little bite.

“So what do you mean that you’re depressed?”

Adam choked at Jordan’s sudden question and coughed several times. He felt Jordan thumped his back and muttered, “Bloody hell, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

Adam gasped and took out his water bottle from his bag. He gulped amount of water and sighed when he could breathe normally again.

“I know you’re a clumsy guy, but this is another level.”

Adam glared and squinted his eyes. “It’s your fault for blurting out a question like that, fucker.”

“Just answer me, will ya.”

Adam looked away and fidgeted. “I’m sorry.”

Jordan was taken aback by the sudden apologize. He was speechless and decided to let Adam continue.

“I’m sorry for accusing you of something that you didn’t do. I get it now. You are sincere, and I’m the one who acted like a jerk.”

Jordan was stunned, but he still felt hurt by Adam’s rejection. Jordan scoffed. “It took me being away from you to realize that, huh?”

Adam winced and felt his hands trembling. He didn’t want to think about Jordan walked away again, he couldn’t. “Please. You want us to be friend, right? Let’s be friend.”

Jordan laughed felt bitter to Adam’s ears. “We can’t. Who are you kidding, Lallana? We have a lot of bad history, and we can’t just forget about that.”

“So we’re back to being enemies then? Me insults you, and you insult me back, and everything was simple between us?” Adam asked with a hint of desperation.

Jordan looked into Adam’s eyes with a dejected expression on his face. “We can’t go back to that either.”

“So what are we now?”

“We’re nothing. You can pretend that I don’t exist and I’ll do the same.” With that, Jordan got up, ignoring the heavy feeling in his chest and went.

“Don’t walk away again.” Jordan’s steps faltered as he heard Adam’s soft voice. “Please, I beg you, I can’t watch you walk away.”

Jordan fisted his hands and took a deep breath. He turned around and his heart hurt seeing Adam stood in front of him with a glassy eyes.

“You can’t watch me walk away, huh? Fine. I’ll stand here and watch you walk away.”

Adam was shocked and a twinge of hurt crossed his face. He took his bag abruptly and almost ran from that place. Jordan watched him walked away with a heavy heart.

“It’s best for you, Ads.”

\---

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading.  
> I got the inspiration for this fic at work.  
> See, I'm supposed to take notes about something, but the only notes I wrote was the draft for this fic.  
> I'll try my best to update every Sunday (in my country).
> 
> So, thanks again. :)


	4. Never Too Late

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamie Carragher never thought that he would see another rivalry besides his and Gary Neville.  
> But when Jordan Henderson and Adam Lallana came into college, he heard that they were enemies since kindergarten.  
> The first thing that crossed Carra’s mind was ‘damn, they started early’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #ForcaChape  
> God bless you all. Rest in peace.

It’s been three days since Jordan saw Adam, and he felt himself went numb. He sighed and took his books from his locker. He felt someone bumped into him and he prepared to snap when he saw the mop of brown hair. Adam glared at him and Jordan bit his words. Adam took his book and walked away without words, leaving Jordan watched at him helplessly.

“No insult today?”

Jordan turned his head and saw Milly leaned against lockers. Jordan sighed and shook his head. “Nothing, Mills.”

“So what are you guys now? Friends?”

“Nothing.”

Milly scrunched his face. “What do you mean with nothing?” They walked to their first class together. Jordan shrugged and Milly frowned. “I thought you guys friends now.”

Jordan scoffed. “We’re not, and would never be.”

Milly stopped Jordan and looked at him shockingly. “What happened? And don’t tell me nothing, I know you like the back of my hands, Hendo.”

Jordan took a deep breath. “He asked me what we were, and I said to him that we were nothing. It’s as simple as that, Milly.”

“No, there must be more than that. I saw the way his face fell when I told him you wouldn’t come back. There’s no way he faked all of that.”

Jordan gritted his teeth and looked at Milly with a hint of desperation. “He said he was sorry, and that we could be friend, Mills. But I told him no, because even if we became friends, we have a lot of bad history between us. He couldn’t be my friend without feeling scared and worried that I would trick him. I spare him the hurt, so I said we were nothing. That I would pretend he doesn’t exist, and he should do the same.”

Milly looked at him with shocked. “What? You’re an idiot, Hendo! You think you protecting him? You hurt him instead.”

Jordan stared at him blankly and didn’t say anything at all. He was defensive, and Milly knew that. His voice softened. “Hendo, think about it. It seems to me that you protect yourself from hurt, not him.”

Jordan shook his head. “Stop talking about him, Mills. Let’s go to class, we’re gonna be late.” With that, Jordan walked and left Milly whom looked at him with pity.

\---

It continued like that. Every time Adam saw Jordan, he would do something to annoy the younger man. Adam would trip him, bumped into him harshly, and glared in his direction. But Jordan didn’t budge, he kept silent and pretended that Adam didn’t exist. It really made Adam frustrated. He just wanted the younger man to stop ignoring him, to show Jordan that Adam didn’t want to pretend to not acknowledge Jordan presence. Whatever reason Jordan had for ignoring him, Adam wanted to know. But it wouldn’t happen if Jordan kept ignoring him.

Adam gritted his teeth as he saw that Jordan turned around when he recognized him. He punched the wall next to him and rushed out to lunch. He found Dele and Eric at the usual place and dropped to the chair noisily. Dele and Eric both looked at him with a blank face. At first, they were panicked when they saw Adam like this. But after several days, they used to it.

“Hendo again?” Eric asked with amused tone. Adam glared at him and cursed him in his head. That fucker, he wouldn’t know what coming to him when Adam pissed off. Dele elbowed him and looked at Adam with sympathy. “No progress there, Ads?”

“Fucking halfwit. Who does he think he is? A knight in shining armor?!” Adam muttered under his breath and ignored both Dele and Eric. Both of them sighed and let Adam ranting in peace. “Hmph, pretend to ignore each other. For what? Sparing my feeling? Might as well stab me in my heart instead. It surely will lessen the pain. Fucking idiot.”

Several table from that, Jordan felt the back of his neck was prickling.

Emre waved at his face and frowned. “Mate, why Adam was glaring at you?”

“Ignored him.” Jordan answered automatically. Emre looked at him amused. “I would if I can. But the think is, he was glaring at you while muttering something. He looks like he wants to kill you with curse or something.”

Studge, who sat beside Jordan, turned his head as Jordan whispered, “Don’t fucking turn around!”

But Studge was already waving at Adam and grinned when Adam waved back while still glaring at the back of Jordan’s head. “What’s the matter, lad? If I didn’t know you guys better, I would say that it’s a form of foreplay between you two.” Studge smirked while the rest of the table snickered, except Jordan who groaned.

“Stop it. Just don’t look at him. I’m trying to ignore him, dimwit.”

All of them looked at him with interest. “What happened? You can tell us, Hendo.” Lucas said and the rest of the table, except Milly, nodded enthusiastically. Jordan stared at his friends with unamused expression. They stared back at him with kicked puppy expressions and Jordan sighed. “It’s a complicated story.”

Studge snorted. “Please, what’s not complicated between you two.”

Jordan took a deep breath. “I decided to ignore his existence because I think it’s the best for us.”

Lucas frowned, Emre looked confused, and Studge stared at him with shock. “And why do you do that?”

“You guys know I like him, and I can’t pretend that nothing has changed between us. He knew I like him, but he doesn’t have the same feeling. I’m not asking to be his boyfriend right away, there’s impossible. I asked him to be my friend, but he rejected me, accidentally or not. His first instinct when it comes to me is protect himself. I don’t want to force him to accept me, so that’s why.”

“I don’t think Ads forces himself to accept you, Hendo. You should have seen him when he thought you wouldn’t come back.” Lucas pipped in. They thought about the way Adam acted pretty much like a ghost for a week and nodded. Jordan sighed. “I don’t think that proves anything.”

Emre scoffed. “You give up way too easily, Hendo.”

Jordan glared at him and fisted his hands. “Yeah, you’re one to talk, Emre. You don’t like your enemy, yet you don’t have a courage to talk to Phil before. Tell me, will you move your arse if it wasn’t for Alby that made Phil joined our table?”

Emre gritted his teeth and glared equally at Jordan. “Lads, that’s enough. You’re both out of your line.” Milly chastised. Emre bowed his head in shame and anger was out of Jordan immediately. “I’m sorry, Emre. That’s a harsh thing to say.”

Emre nodded. “Me too, mate. What I mean is that you should give this thing with Adam another try.” Jordan nodded solemnly. “Maybe later.”

Studge patted both their shoulders and talked about football to lit up the atmosphere.

\---

Jamie Carragher never thought that he would see another rivalry besides his and Gary Neville. But when Jordan Henderson and Adam Lallana came into college, he heard that they were enemies since kindergarten. The first thing that crossed Carra’s mind was ‘damn, they started early’. He started watching them –and not in the creepy way, mind you- observing how they interacting, and what triggered the usual banter. Stevie said he was like a cupid, always wanted to made two people fell in love and had a happy ending. Carra scoffed and now looked at the said bastard, he was happy with Alonso, didn’t he?

After several times, Carra came to a conclusion. Their rivalry wasn’t like him and Gary. Gary and he became enemy because that’s just in their blood. Carra bleeds Liverpool red while Gary was a Manchester through and through. They hate each other on principle, no sob story how they became enemy or shit like that. It’s different for Jordan and Adam though. Jordan and Adam was destined for each other. It’s crap, actually, there’s no such thing like a soulmate. Carra didn’t believe in soulmate, and when he said they were destined for each other he didn’t mean it like a fairy tale. Like when two people that never met before bump into each other and decided they were made for each other. It’s far from that. They were destined to complete each other strengths and weaknesses.

Carra saw that Jordan always drawn to Adam. Whatever he did, there must be at least once a day he annoyed the shit out of Adam. It was crystal clear that Jordan liked Adam since God knows when. And his action to choose to annoy Adam could be compared with children hopelessly pulling pig tails to get attention from their crush. Carra didn’t blame him. Maybe Jordan had liked Adam since they were child, and it’s not easy to break the habit.

The one complicated was Adam. Carra saw him as a cheerful lad, who ready to help anyone who needs help. The thing was he didn’t realize that he needed help too. He rarely saw Adam without smile. At first Carra thought that just the way he was, nothing more. But as the time went by, Carra realized that Adam hid a lot of things behind his smile. Maybe he had something terrible happened in the past, maybe he lost someone, Carra could only speculate. But the thing was Adam seemed free when he fought with Jordan. He couldn’t control his emotion when he was with Jordan. Just last week Carra was shocked to see Adam skipped class and looked like shit. He asked Stevie if he knew what happened and speechless when the reason was Hendo’s temporary departure. (After that he knew that almost everyone lied to Adam and he felt sympathy for the boy).

The bottom line was they brought passion to each other life. Jordan was calm by nature, mischievous, and used to being anchor for everyone. He was born a leader, while Adam was more like a wildcard. Adam seemed calm on the outside, but he had a hidden emotion that needed to be released. It’s not good to hide so many emotions in the form of a smile. That’s the way Carra saw them. Jordan could keep Adam grounded and Adam could bring out more emotion from Jordan.

Right now, Carra watched Jordan and Adam in his class with interest. Adam glared at Jordan intently, while the latter tried so hard to ignore the former. Carra titled his head and decided that today could be an interesting day. Both Stevie and Xabi came to him week ago and begged him to do something about Jordan and Adam. Carra refused at first, it seemed to much trouble and he didn’t want to think about that kind of problem right now. Both the power couple was relentless, and they said only him could help them. That fuckers.

Carra waited for all of the boys to sit down and started the class. “Good afternoon, lads. Let’s do something interesting today, eh. I will call two people to the front of the class, and they will talk. You can talk about random thing, you can say anything you want to say with your partner, whom I choose, by the way. You have five minutes, so use it wisely.”

Eric Dier raised his hand with a confused expression. “I’m sorry, Mr. Carra. But what is it for?”

Carra grinned and looked at them mischievously. “It’s useful for bonding, Dier. Maybe some of you have something to say to each other. It’s a good opportunity for that.”

Eric’s face dawned with realization and he snorted. Carra grinned got wider and he clasped his hands enthusiastically. “Good, now I will choose my first victim.” He looked around his class gleefully and met with various expressions. He chose Joe Gomez and Nathaniel Clyne first. Everyone expected that they would talk about rap, and no one disappointed. After them, Carra chose Loris Karius and Dejan Lovren. They talked about fashion, and almost half of the class wrote a note. When it came to Emre Can and Eric Dier, everyone was excited. They were amusing.

“So, ehm can I ask you something personal?” Emre started. Everone perked up and Eric smiled warily. “Sure?”

“Its ehm, I need advice, actually. It’s ehm oh fuck it. How did you win Dele’s heart?” Emre blurted out his question. Eric was stunned and his face getting red. “If you think you can take away Delboy from me, then-“

“What?! No! I mean, I like someone else!” Emre explained fastly and Eric’s face getting redder for another reason. “Oh.”

Everybody snickered and decided to tell Dele about this. He wasn’t in Carra’s class, he was in Pepe Reina’s. Both Eric and Emre was blushing and they fidgeted awkwardly while the class watched them with interest.

“It’s ehm, I’m not sure, actually. It’s involve a lot of pining and mixed signal to get us here.” Eric answered awkwardly. Emre looked at him with disbelief. “Really?”

“Yeah, really.”

“How did you realize that you like him?”

“I just did. I mean, Delboy and I have been friends since high school. He was a transfer student and so was I. We have a lot in common. We do almost everything together and one day I just realized that I like him. I want him by my side and that’s it.”

Almost all the girls and half the boys cooed and Eric suddenly realized he was in front of the class talking about his love life. He decided to give a payback to Emre for asking something like this. If he burned, he wanted somebody with him.

“So, who’s the lucky one?” Eric asked. Emre looked like a deer in a headlights. “What?”

“The one you like. I want to know.” All of the class nodded and Carra smirked.

Emre was blushing and cleared his throat. “It’s the umm, Brazilian student.”

“Nice, Emre. There’s only so much Brazilian student in our college. You gotta be more specific, man-“

“It’s Coutinho.” Emre blurted out. Eric widened his eyes and heard a collective gasps. He heard someone shouted “I knew it” but didn’t sure whom. Eric smiled and felt happy for his friend. “Good luck, Emre. Last advice, you should always be there for him, no matter what.”

Emre smiled shyly and nodded. “Thanks, man.”

Everyone applauded and cheered and Carra grinned seeing this. He called the remaining students and decided to left Jordan and Adam for the last. He had a feeling that they would need more than five minutes to talk. When it came to them, everybody waited with anticipation. Adam walked to the front angrily as he suspected that he would be paired with Jordan.

Both Jordan and Adam were silent and looked away from each other. “Go on, lads.” Carra had to remind them that they had to talk.

“Why are you like this?” Adam asked but still didn’t look at Jordan. He looked at the floor with a fisted hands at his sides while Jordan turned around to look at him.

“It’s what’s good for us.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

“I’m trying to solve the problem between us.”

“You’re only make it worse.”

“How come I make it worse? It’s best for us like this-“

“You don’t have a right to choose for me!” Adam finally snapped and turned his head at Jordan.

“What do you mean by that?”

“You want to ignore me, fine. But I never choose to ignore you.”

“You don’t make any sense.” Jordan shook his head.

“Really? You know why you choose to ignore me? It’s because you’re afraid. You started all of this and when it’s got out of control, you decided to quit. I didn’t know that you’re such a quitter.”

“I’m not!”

“Yeah? You’re a coward then. You choose to run away and-“

Jordan punched Adam. No one saw it coming and they were shocked. Adam was stunned at first when he felt a sting on his left cheek. Upon realized what’s happening, he ran into Jordan and punched him back. They were left punching each other until Carra and several boys tried to break them apart. Eric and Dejan was holding Adam while Emre and Milly holding Jordan. Adam’s cheeks was bruised and his left eye was starting to get black, while Jordan spotting a bruised cheeks and a bloody nose. Carra stood between them.

“What’s wrong with you, lads?! I said talking, not punching the daylight out of each other!”

Both Jordan and Adam looked ashamed and Carra shook his head. “You two come with me. The rest of you could go. The class is over.”

Adam and Jordan tailed Carra to his office and walked as far away from each other. Upon arriving at his office, Carra took a first aid kit and placed it on his desk. “Go on, sit down.”

Carra looked at them with disbelief and shook his head. “You give me headache there, lads. Now, I would leave you two to take care of each other. I would lock my office until you both settle your dispute, and I would do it as long as I want. So, it’s up to you both.” After that, Carra walked out from his office and locked it. There was uncomfortable silence between them.

They stayed like that for like ten minutes until Adam got up and took the first aid kit. “Let me see your nose.”

Jordan startled and looked at him with disbelief. His nose stopped bleeding while ago, but he thought that the way he breathe through his mouth must be irritating for Adam. Adam took the first aid kit box and walked to the sofa on the corner of the room. It would be more comfortable. Jordan followed him and sat right in front of him. They were facing each other and Adam took a napkin and went to take an ice cube from mini refrigerator on the corner. He wrapped the ice with the napkin and gently pressed it on Jordan’s nose. Jordan winced from the sudden coldness, but he was mesmerized but the sight of concentrated Adam in front of him.

“I can do this myself, you know.” Jordan whispered, but Adam didn’t budge. He concentrated to apply some pressure on Jordan’s nose.

“You’re left eye and cheeks could give an ice pack too.”

Adam kept silent, but his hand was going still. He looked like he tried so hard to compose himself, and Jordan didn’t blame him for it. It was Jordan who punched first, after all.

Jordan looked directly into Adam’s eyes and whispered, “Hey, I’m sorry. Again. What you said to me are true, and I’m too prideful to admit it. I’m a coward. I’m really sorry that I keep hurting you even though it isn’t my intention. You see that now? That’s why we better off to not knowing each other. It’s-“

“Could you just shut up!”

Jordan was startled when Adam snapped, but he grew concern when he realized that Adam was shaking. “Ads, are you okay? Do I-“

“Stop it. Stop saying things that make me feel like I’m matters to you. Stop acting like you care if what you want to do is walk away.” Adam begged.

Jordan was stunned and gripped Adam’s hand that held the icepack. He took it from Adam and gently put it on Adam’s left eye. Adam stared at him dejected. “Is that how you feel?” Jordan asked gently. Adam stayed silent.

“Do you feel like you don’t matter to me?”

“It sure feels like that.”

Jordan chuckled. “No way I could forget you, Ads. You should know better than that.”

“Well, I’m sorry. I don’t know how the appropriate reaction when someone who I thought enemy after all this time told me that he actually cares about me.”

Jordan laughed. “I thought that you forced yourself to accept me. I know it must be shocking to you. I know that you would be wary around me even if we could become a friend. I wouldn’t want you to feel like you obligated to accept me as your friend just because you think it what you should do.”

Adam snorted. “Stop acting like you’re my knight in shining armor. You do not force me into anything. I may be need more time to accept you as my friend, but it doesn’t mean I wouldn’t willing to try. Stop thinking that I am rejecting you.”

Jordan looked at him sharply and snorted. “We’re a bloody mess, aren’t we?”

Adam chuckled and he felt his chest full with a warm feeling. A realization came upon him, and he looked at Jordan amused. “You call me Ads.”

Jordan blushed and looked away. “You call me Ads. Not my last name, or my first name. You call me with my nickname.”

Jordan cleared his throat. “Yeah, I always call you ‘Ads’ on my head.”

Adam smiled blossoms and looked warmly at Jordan. “Can I call you Hendo, then?”

Jordan looked at him intently and Adam could feel his face heats up. “Yeah, you can call me Hendo.”

“It’s a truce between us, then?”

“Yeah, Ads. It’s a truce.”

\---

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, they have a progress.  
> Not bad for a start, eh.  
> Thank you for everyone who comment, kudos and read this story.  
> I love you so much.


	5. Closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Why are you frowning, Hendo? Something’s wrong with your food?” Adam asked him gleefully.
> 
> Jordan glared at him and kicked his shin under the table. “I’m okay.”
> 
> Both Dele and Eric looked at them with disbelief.
> 
> “Oh he’s ‘Hendo’ now?” Eric asked sarcastically. Adam turned his head and glared at Eric. “What?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this is soooo late.  
> I was sick and my sister got married, so yeah.  
> I hope you will enjoy this chapter.  
> I'll try to update regularly again.

Carra was pleased when he came into his office and saw both Adam and Jordan sat beside each other awkwardly. Both of them avoided looking at each other, but the tension felt a little less intense. Carra saw that they tended their wounds and made them leave. But not before giving them a ‘little’ punishment.

“You want us to what?” Jordan looked at him like he was mental, the nerve of that boy.

“You hear me clearly, Hendo.” Carra answered calmly. Ads shook his head and looked at him with disbelief. “You want us to stay with each other during our free time. For two whole weeks.”

“Including weekends.”

“Yeah, that too.”

Carra nodded his head. “You know fighting isn’t allowed in class, and you did it in mine. So, it’s a fair punishment, I think.”

Jordan frowned. “Fighting isn’t allowed in class. So, is it allowed as long as it’s not in class?”

“You both can do it in the hallway or library for all I care, as long as you do not caught.”

Adam glared at Jordan. “You are focused on the unimportant thing on that statement. Excuse me, Mr. Carragher, I don’t think the punishment is necessary. We realize that we’re wrong, and we promise it won’t happen again.”

“Adam, you still get the punishment, no matter what you say. So I suggest both of you to suck it up and get out of my office. I expected your report in three days. See you, lads.”

Adam and Jordan went out and sighed. They looked at each other with pained expression and took a deep breath.

“Guess we just have to tell each other schedule then, and decide what’s we gonna do about it later.” Jordan suggested. Adam just shrugged. “Fine by me. See you after class then.”

“Yeah.”

\---

Jordan walked to the track field and found himself wondering just how long did he know Adam’s schedules and habits by heart. Adam didn’t say where they would meet, yet Jordan knew that Adam always sat under the bleacher on the track field. He always did that after all his classes were over. Sometimes Adam seemed like in a deep thought, watching straight to the track field and did nothing. Sometimes Jordan saw him closed his eyes and looked so peaceful.

 _Fuck, I felt like a stalker._ Jordan cursed inwardly.

Adam looked up when he saw Jordan was approaching. He was writing something on a piece of paper, and gave it to Jordan. It was Adam’s schedules. Jordan read it carefully and recognized almost half of it.

“Is this all?” Jordan asked as he sat besides Adam. “Yeah, that was all of my class and running practice.”

“I guess we can make this work.”

“How about you? You haven’t give me yours.”

Jordan shrugged. “I will adapt my schedule with yours. If I don’t follow you, that means I’m somewhere else.”

Adam looked at him with disbelief. “You’re impossible.”

“Eh, part of my charm.” Adam snorted while Jordan grinned.

“You know I have a tournament coming up, so I would have more practice from now on.” Adam said.

Jordan hummed. “Okay. I have football practice anyway.”

“Right. You’ll also face a tournament anytime soon, right?” Jordan nodded, so Adam continued, “I saw you on your last friendly match. I think that you’re a pretty good captain.”

Jordan turned his head so fast and looked at him with disbelief. “Did you just give me a compliment?”

Adam cleared his throat awkwardly. “It’s not a compliment.”

“So what do you call that?”

“An observation.”

Jordan smirked and teased him. “Really? So you observed me _during match_ now?”

“I’m not! I observed everyone as your team is my college team too. So I paid attention to all of you.”

“I see. What do you think about Emre’s performance then?”

“I think he’s pretty good. He created several great passes.” Adam said and when he looked up, he saw that Jordan looked at him with a glint in his eyes. “What?” Adam uncomfortably asked.

“You’re a liar.”

“I’m not!” Adam said defensively and before he could asked Jordan what he meant by that, Jordan continued. “You are. Emre wasn’t even in the game, he was injured.”

Oh.

Oh.

Fuck.

Adam flushed and looked away. Jordan stared at him with fondness and decided to have a mercy. “Relax. I won’t ask you about that. I understand. Come on, let’s go home.”

Adam felt glad but he still refused to look at Jordan. “Fine. See you later.”

Before Adam could run away, Jordan grabbed his arm and made him stop. “Wait, I’ll walk you home.”

Adam looked at him surprised and felt himself blushing. “What? No! Why would you-“

“Come on.” Jordan hid his smile and dragged a protested Adam by his arm. After several attempt of failed escape, Adam surrendered and let Jordan walked him home. There was an awkward silence between them and Adam thought very hard to make a conversation. Anything besides the uncomfortable silence, as it made his thought felt very loud and clear. Before he could say anything, Jordan beat him into it. “You don’t have to say anything at all, you know.”

“What?”

“I can hear you thinking, Ads. You don’t have to say anything if you have nothing to say.”

Adam looked at him with awe. “How do you know that?”

Jordan cleared his throat and avoided eye contact. “Lucky guess.”

“No, I think you’re lying. It doesn’t feel like a lucky guess.” Adam pressed and Jordan sighed, “Fine. I just know.”

Adam frowned and poked Jordan’s shoulder. “That’s not helping and I still don’t understand, at all.”

“Stop poking me, you immature bastard.”

Adam grinned. _This feels familiar._

“Come to think of it, how do you know my home?” Adam asked when Jordan lead the way without Adam told him where to go. Jordan looked at him with disbelief. “Are you seriously asking me that?”

Adam frowned. “What?”

“Don’t tell me you don’t know where I live.” Hearing that, Adam felt himself blushing –again- and Jordan snorted.

“Yeah, I get it.” Adam muttered. Jordan looked at him and chuckled. Being enemy since kindergarten, there’s no way they didn’t know the ‘personal profile’ about each other. Sometimes, your enemy knew more about you than your friends did.

When they arrived, Adam fidgeted in front of his home. “Ehm, do you want to come in?”

Jordan looked at him funnily and shook his head. “I don’t think it’s wise to invite me in since we barely even friends. Who knows what I would do to your home.”

Adam looked at him with disbelief and bursted out laughing. “You jerk.”

Jordan grinned. “See you later, halfwit.” With that, he went away and Adam watched him with fondness.

_Feel like we’ve been friends for years._

\---

They were surprisingly okay being together almost all the time. They were waiting for the day they had had enough and went back to hate each others gut, but that day didn’t happen. The only argument they had was where would they sit at lunch. They compromised and decided to switch between Adam’s and Jordan’s. Today, they were sitting with Dele and Eric. Jordan looked uncomfortable seeing how close Dele and Eric were. Don’t get him wrong, he knew they were couple, and he was friend with both of them, but it still awkward seeing them together from close proximity. Beside him, Adam grinned. Jordan was sure Adam felt very happy with his discomfort.

“Why are you frowning, Hendo? Something’s wrong with your food?” Adam asked him gleefully. Jordan glared at him and kicked his shin under the table. “I’m okay.”

Both Dele and Eric looked at them with disbelief. “Oh he’s ‘Hendo’ now?” Eric asked sarcastically. Adam turned his head and glared at Eric. “What?”

“Adam, just several weeks ago that you mad when we call him ‘Hendo’” Dele added. Jordan stared at them with confused expression. “What?”

“I don’t want to talk about that.”

Eric snorted. “Of course you don’t. You’re friend with ‘Hendo’ now.”

Adam felt his face burst into flame, and Dele chuckled was not helping. “What’s it about?” Jordan asked, but nobody paid attention to him.

“Hey, Delboy. Do you remember what happened last week?” Eric asked teasingly. Dele pretended to be in a deep thought and gasped out of sudden. “Oh, somebody ignoring us in order to think about someone he calls his enemy.”

“That’s not true-“

“Right. And now that somebody ignoring us to flirt with his so called enemy.”

“I’m not-“

“Remember when we call Jordan ‘Hendo’ and somebody got mad about that?”

“It’s okay guys. It’s not like I’m here anyway.” Jordan said as sarcastic as ever. All three of them turned their attention towards him. Dele and Eric smirked while Adam looked at him with puppy eyes.

“What do you call Adam here, Hendo?” Eric asked cheekily. Jordan looked at him funnily but shrugged and answered the question. “Ads.”

Dele whistled. “They’re go straight to nickname basis, honey.”

If Adam glared could melt things, both Eric and Dele would be gone by now. “We’re trying to be friends here. That’s why we call each other using our nickname.”

“What kind of friend? Friend with benefit? Or friend who’s pining over each other in daily basis?” Eric asked casually. Adam was sputtered while Jordan looked at him like he was mental. “All this time I thought you’re the normal one, Eric. I never feel very wrong in my life.” Jordan said.

Adam scoffed. “You thought he was normal? Didn’t you see he was ready to fight Emre just because he thought Emre gonna steal his boy?”

This time, Dele looked at them with confusion while Eric blushed. Dele glanced at Eric and he knew right away something had happened. “What’s that about Emre?” Dele asked curiously.

“It’s nothing, Delboy. Just some misunderstanding.” Eric assured him. He felt uneasy when he saw Adam and Jordan worn an identical smirk. Fuck, he knew he was screwed.

“No, tell me. I want to know what it is about.” Dele insisted. He stared at Eric, but the latter avoided his eyes. He turned his attention towards smirking Adam. “Ads?”

Adam clasped his hands and starting to tell his own version of story, obnoxiously. “It’s started like this. One day, in Mr. Carragher’s class, we had to talk in front of the class in pair. Your boyfriend here was partnered with Emre. We could talk about anything, and who knows Emre asked how Prince Eric here gets you as his boy. Eric was starting to get mad, thinking that Emre planned to take you away from him. The truth is, Emre asked an advice to woo Phil.”

Dele widened his eyes. “Philippe Coutinho?”

“Yup.”

“I knew it!” Dele shouted triumphantly. The rest of them looked at him with disbelief. Finally, Jordan broke the silence. “See, Ads. I’m not the only one who has a problem with keeping-attention-to-unimportant-things.”

Eric looked at him fondly while Adam face palmed. Suddenly, Dele turned to Eric and smiled shyly. “I won’t leave you for anyone else.” Eric was stunned and his face starting to get red. He grabbed Dele and gave him a headlock while Dele giggling loudly. Both Jordan and Adam fake a gag.

“Do they always disgustingly cute like this?” Jordan asked. Adam gave a painful sigh. “You have no idea.”

They stared at the lovey dovey couple until Adam decided he had had enough, grabbed Jordan’s arm and dragged him away. “Where are we going?”

“Library. Anywhere. Just stay away from them.”

Jordan shrugged. “Fine. Library then.”

They were walking side by side towards the library when Jordan chuckled. “You can let go of my arm, Ads.”

Adam let go of Jordan’s arm like it was burned and his face turned red. He could hear that Jordan snickered behind him and decided to elbow his rib. “Ow, you fucker.”

Adam couldn’t stop smiling when he heard Jordan cursed.

\---

Emre and Philippe sat together awkwardly in one of library’s corner. They planned to learn together and today was the day. Emre tried to smile and made Philippe at ease. Meanwhile, Philippe just sat in front of him and bowed his head shyly.

“So.” Emre broke the silence. “What will we discuss today?”

Philippe fidgeted and tried to smile, but Emre could see that he was nervous as hell. “Ehm, anything is fine.”

Emre thought for a moment and decided that lesson could wait. “I see. So, let’s get to know about each other first. Is that okay?” Philippe nodded.

“So, can I call you Phil? I heard that Alby and Bobby call you that. It’s okay if you’re uncomfortable, I won’t-“

“You can call me Phil.”

“Oh, okay.” Emre was glad Philippe stopped him from making a fool out of himself. He tended to lose his cool in front of the cute Brazilian boy. “What should I call you?”

“What?”

“Do you ehm- have a nickname or something?” Philippe bit his lip. Emre suddenly got the urge to kiss that lips. “Emre.”

“What?”

“You can call me Emre. No nickname.”

Philippe face was brightened and he smiled widely. “Emre then.” Emre took a lot of effort to restraint himself from hugging Phil. “So, Phil. Tell me about yourself.”

“What? Is it an interrogation now?” Philippe asked cheekily. Emre laughed and put his hands on the table to lean towards Philippe. “Just want to know you more.”

Philippe blushed and bowed his head shyly. “That’s not much interesting things about me.”

“You’ll be surprised that I’m also an ordinary man.” Emre retorted. Philippe grinned and shook his head. “Fine, I was born in Rio. I moved from Espanyol to Liverpool to finish my education. I love playing football, and I have a hard time to describe myself when somebody asked.”

Emre chuckled. “You’re opening line is good, I think. Fine, I’ll ask you then. What position do you play in football?”

Philippe bit his lips. “I usually play as attacking midfielder or winger.”

“Are you good?” Emre asked teasingly. Philippe wore an offended look. “Excuse me, Sir. I would say I’m the best.”

Emre laughed and Philippe grinned. “You should have joined the football team. Why don’t you?”

Philippe shrugged. “I enjoy watching from the bleacher more.”

“Will you someday? Watch me play, I mean.” Emre stared at him with fondness and Philippe could feel his heart beat faster. “Yeah. I’d love to.”

Emre broke his stare and scratched his nose. “Em, what’s your biggest dream?”

“Em, I want to travel around the world. Meet a lot of new people, learn about others culture, see the rest of the world.”

Emre whistled. “That’s a great dream. Maybe I could help you achieve a small part of that.”

“How come?”

“Do you want to go to Germany on holiday? I could take you to my home.”

“Are you offering, Emre? I wouldn’t say no to that, and you couldn’t regret about it.” Philippe asked enthusiastically. Emre chuckled and smiled. “I’m serious. I could take you sightseeing.”

“Really?!”

“Yeah, I’d love to.” Emre copied Philippe. Philippe shrieked and jumped right to hug Emre while muttering thank you again and again. Emre was frozen in place until he heard someone whistled.

“I didn’t know that learning together means cuddle nowadays.”

Philippe released himself from Emre and blushing furiously. Emre almost moaned because the lost of Philippe warmth and looked up to see Moreno and Firmino smirking at them.

“Hey, lads. Mind if we join you?” Alby asked rhetorically and sat besides Philippe. Meanwhile, Bobby took a seat beside Emre. “So, how’s the learning?” Bobby asked.

“It’s good.” Philippe fidgeted and he felt doomed when he saw a glistening in Alby’s eyes. “So, you could say a few phrases in German now, no?”

“Ehm..”

“We haven’t learn that yet, lads.” Emre cut off. Bobby and Alby tsked and looked at Phil with puppy eyes. “But you can say one sentence, right?” Alby said pleadingly.

“Okay, okay. I remember only one phrase.” Philippe said and put one finger in front of him.

“Go on, say it then.” Bobby urged. Philippe took a deep breath, looked at Emre, and muttered, “Ich mag dich.”

Emre felt his breath was forced out of his lungs when he heard Phil said that. He knew Phil didn’t mean it, but hearing him said that made a burts of warmth in his heart. He was stared at Phil for a long time until Philippe cleared his throat. “My accent is terrible, right?”

Emre was woken up from his frozen state. “No, no. It’s alright, you’re good.” Philippe beamed and Emre was so lost in that blinding smile. Both Alby and Bobby grinned and sneaked out quietly. They would leave the two pining boy alone. For now. They bumped into Jordan and Adam on the way out. Alby smiled awkwardly at them. Then he was surprised when Adam hugged him and Jordan patted his head. Without another words, they left him frozen at the door. Bobby smirked and patted his shoulder. “Looks like you find yourself big brothers, Albertito.”

Alby blushed and shoved Bobby. “Shut up.”

“It’s touching, you find yourself a pair of dads on Mr. Gerrard and Mr. Alonso, now you have brothers too.”

“Quiet, lad.” Bobby chuckled.

\---

The first thing Jordan saw when he went into the library was Emre and Philippe sat together and looked at each other with fondness. He smirked and thought fucking finally. Adam followed his line of sight and grinned when he saw them too. “They’re cute couple, aren’t they.”

Jordan nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“Come on. I had to finish my project.” Adam walked towards the empty table and Jordan followed him with wide eyes. “What? I thought we came to library to sat lazily and doing nothing!”

Adam scoffed and looked at him with disbelief. “Who said anything about that, halfwit?”

Jordan grunted and sat grudgingly besides Adam. Adam started taking out his project and got up to take the book he needed. When he came back, Adam gave him the book about football history. “What is it for?” Jordan asked confused.

Adam shrugged. “I’ll need time to finish my project, and I don’t want you to get bored. So, I give that book. You know, reading is good for you. Your brain could use some exercise.”

Jordan kicked his shin under the table, but he grinned from ear to ear. “Fucking smart ass.”

They spent their time like that, Adam was busy finishing his project while Jordan read the book peacefully. It’s almost an hour when Adam stretched his body and wrote the last piece of paragraph for his project. “Hey, Hendo. I almost finished.”

When he got no response, Adam looked up and saw that Jordan was asleep. He was sleeping on top of the book Adam gave with his hands curled around his head. Adam was mesmerized. Jordan looked so peaceful and he looked so bloody handsome. Adam blushed and scratched his nose awkwardly.

_It must be the light that make his face looks so angelic._

Adam felt himself smiling softly and took off his jacket to cover Jordan’s sleeping body. He put it around Jordan’s shoulder gently and continued to finish his project. To think that someone so beautiful like Jordan liked him was a strange thing for Adam.

\---

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys watched this two idiots gave a surprise to a bunch of students, right?  
> Am I not the only one crazy about that, right?
> 
> Thank you for all of you who read, comment and kudos this story.  
> I looove you guys.  
> Merry Christmas for all of you that celebrated it. :)


	6. Complicated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Yeah. Our relationship is complicated, with a lot of pining..”
> 
> “...Mixed signals...”
> 
> “...Lingering touch...”
> 
> “..and self control. Don’t forget about that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiyaa. Happy New Year 2017 For All of You!!  
> I hope you all will have a great year.  
> This the new chapter for you. Enjoy! :)
> 
> This story has no relation whatsoever with the real person mentioned here.

The day they sat on Jordan’s table was a nightmare for both of them. They were teased mercilessly that they thought it would be better to skip lunch. When they came together, Studge smirked and made them sat in front of him, while the rest of them sat on the opposite direction. Emre grinned, Milly’s eyes crinkled, and Lucas looked like he would burst into tears any minute. They were silent until Jordan had had enough and snapped. “Fuck off, you lot.”

Adam fidgeted in his seat while the rest of them didn’t react as if Jordan didn’t say anything. Studge clasped his hands and wore that shit eating smirk. “Lads, I never knew that the engagement will be this soon.”

Adam choked while Jordan kicked what he hoped Studge’s leg. Milly cursed. “Fuck, watch where your bloody foot.”

Jordan faked an innocent face and thumped Adam in the back. Now, Emre was the one commented. “Aww, looked at them. Feeling domestic already.”

Jordan glared and Adam’s cheeks reddened. “I claim a spot to be the best man!” Studge shouted. Milly shoved him and Emre threw a fries at him. “No way. I claim that title.” Emre shouted.

“Fuck off. If someone get the best man title, that’s me. I have to put up with them since kindergarten.” Milly claimed.

“Sod off! No one becomes the best man.” Jordan shouted. They looked at him with offended look and gasped. “You would have a secret wedding and ditch us, right?” Lucas asked. Jordan put his palms on his face and took a deep breath. Adam looked at him with pity and focused his attention towards the gang. “What’s with this wedding thingy?”

Studge gasped dramatically. “He hasn’t proposed to you yet? Are we ruined the surprise then?”

“No one’s going to propose. What’s wrong with you lads?!” Jordan asked exasperatedly and turned his head to Adam to seek for help. But Adam looked a little bit offended that Jordan raised his eyebrows. “What’s wrong?”

Adam scoffed and looked away from Jordan. “Nothing.”

Jordan turned his chair so he looked directly at Adam’s direction. “No, you clearly upset. What is it? Is it something I said?”

The rest of the table was silent and looked at them with interest. It’s so strange to see them so intimate and clearly care about each other all of sudden. It’s like the whole enemy things were a joke to get them to know about each other. Adam furrowed his eyebrows, sign that he contemplated whether to say something or not. “Nothing. It’s silly anyway.”

“No, tell me. I want to know.” Jordan insisted.

“Don’t make me say it, please.” Adam looked at him with pleading eyes and Jordan words faltered. He nodded and resumed his lunch as if nothing happened. If Adam didn’t want to tell him, he would respect that. Adam felt guilty and he excused himself to go to class, despite it was still twenty minutes to go. Jordan gave an affirmative nod and watched him walked away. There were an awkward silent until Lucas cleared his throat. “What’s going on, hermano?”

Jordan looked at him grimly and shook his head. “Seriously, Hendo. What’s up?” Milly asked. Jordan sighed and played with his napkin. “That’s Adam, lads.”

“What? What do you mean by that?” Emre asked curiously.

“I could say that he- he kind of wounded, if you know what I mean.”

“Wounded how?” Studge asked. Jordan shrugged. “I’m not sure myself. I’m still trying to figure it out. I just can say that there are a lot of wall or surface, whatever, behind Adam Lallana that you know.”

“When did you realize that?” Milly asked curiously. Jordan sighed and rubbed his face. “Recently. The more I get to know him the more I realize he’s hiding his feeling. This whole things that happened with us recently made me realize that he was –is- in pain. I was so blind that I didn’t realize that sooner.”

Lucas leaned over to pat Jordan’s shoulder. “It’s not your fault, buddy. But I must say that Adam is good at hiding his feeling. The only time we saw him miserable was when he thought you’ve gone to Sunderland.”

Both Milly and Studge winced and felt guilty because they lied to Adam about Jordan departure. “Damn, what have we done?” Milly whispered.

“Hey, don’t worry about it. I’m sure he has forgiven you already.”

“You sure about that?” Studge asked. Jordan shrugged. “He has a big heart, he wouldn’t hold a grudge for too long.”

“Except for you.” Emre interrupted.

“Except for me.”

\---

Jordan waited for Adam in front of his class. After his strange attitude yesterday, Adam kind of avoided him. Jordan had a football practice yesterday, so he didn’t meet Adam until now. There’s still five minutes before the bell and Jordan got bored of waiting. He leaned on the wall right beside the door so he could catch Adam before he tried to run away. He didn’t have to though, because Adam approached him as soon as he got out of the class.

“Hey, Hendo. Can we have lunch at somewhere else?”

Jordan was silent for a moment as he contemplated what Adam just said. “Like where?”

Adam looked down and cleared his throat. “Is under the bleacher okay?”

Jordan looked at him with disbelief. “Really, Ads?”

“Yeah, you’re right. It’s ridiculous. Forget what I-“

“No! Let’s go, I don’t mean it like that. Just let me grab something from cafetaria first, okay.” Jordan moved to go when he felt Adam held his upper arm. “You don’t have to. I bring you lunch.”

Jordan’s mouth was hanging open when he realized what Adam said and looked at the way he fidgeted and flushed. “You bring a lunch for me?”

“Yeah, it’s, just- can we go now?” Adam was exasperated and didn’t wait for Jordan to reply as Adam dragged him to the track field. Upon arriving there, they sat under the bleacher side by side. Jordan was impressed when he saw Adam took two lunch box from his backpack. “You’re not joking.”

Adam stared at him with an offended look. “Why would I joke?”

“It’s just –I don’t know. What’s for lunch?” Adam knew it was a blatant attempt to redirect their conversation, but he didn’t mind. Jordan was patient with him after all this time, and if Adam couldn’t say how much it meant to him, he definitely could show it.

“It’s just sandwich and an apple. I hope you don’t mind.”

“No, it’s great. Really.” Adam smiled shyly and gave Jordan his share. Jordan took it gratefully and they ate in comfortable silence. When they finished, Jordan looked at him curiously. Sensing Jordan’s stare, Adam fidgeted and busied himself with rummaging his backpack.”

“Ads,” Jordan said softly, “You can tell me.”

Adam was stilled and didn’t know what to do. His expression was so open that Jordan could see right through him. The wind was breezing and Jordan waited patiently for Adam to composure himself.

“I’m sorry that you have to put up with me..” Adam started. He was looking away from Jordan, and Jordan didn’t interrupt him, waiting for Adam to find his words. “Because of this stupid punishment, you have to have lunch here, not with your friends. Sorry for being such an inconvenience.”

They were silent until Jordan spoke up. “I never mind, Ads. I never think of you as an inconvenience.”

Adam didn’t reply and Jordan knew he was still blaming himself. “What brings this up?” Jordan asked. Adam took a deep breath and his eyes looked hollow. Jordan didn’t like that.

Instead of answering Jordan questions, Adam talked about anything else. “We agree that we would take turn for lunch, right? Do you mind if we lunch here from now on? I could bring you lunch.”

 _From now on._ Jordan thought. _Not until our punishment is over._

Jordan leaned his body to the right a bit so he could see Adam clearer even though the later looked down. He could see the desperation in Adam’s eyes and felt his heart ached. He decided to confront about this later. “Sure, Ads.”

The tension was out of Adam immediately. Jordan could see the relief in his eyes and he desperately wanted to know what’s going on. But then Adam gave him a soft smile and Jordan decided whatever it was could wait.

“Your guilty pleasure is cooking?” Jordan asked out of sudden. Adam’s face reddened and he cleared his throat awkwardly. “Baking, actually.”

“No way. You could bake?”

“Yeah. Is it weird?”

“What? Why?”

“It’s just- I think a lot of people would think it’s a weird hobby. I don’t know.”

“The hell with everybody else. You gotta do what you want to do.”

Adam chuckled and Jordan felt a surge of warm and proud for making Adam cheerful again. “Seriously though, you should bake for me.” Jordan continued. Adam looked at him with a crinkle eyes and disbelief. “You want to try my baking?”

“Yeah, why not. Beside, I have a sweet tooth, and I would never reject a free cake, or biscuit. Whatever.”

“Don’t you have to be in shape, what with football team and diet stuff. You are bad example for your teammate, captain.” Adam teased. Jordan laughed and looked at him with twinkles in his eyes. “It could be our little secret.”

Adam let out a laugh. “Fine. If you insist.” Jordan was satisfied and grinned from ear to ear. “Don’t blame me if you get into trouble because of that though.” Adam continued.

Jordan crossed his heart and said solemnly. “Scout’s honor.”

Adam grinned and felt his heart lighter. Never in his entire life that he was grateful for someone named Jordan Henderson. “Ah, Hendo, before I forget, I would go to my friend’s studio after school. I just want to tell you, so you don’t have to walk me home.”

“What? No, I’ll come with you.”

“But you don’t have to.”

Jordan stared at him with a serious expression. “Do you not want me to come?” Adam breathe faltered and his mind felt like it ran a mile an hour.

 _Do I want Jordan to come?_ He thought, and he felt like his heart answered him. _Yes, you don’t want to be alone._

“I want you to come with me.” Adam said softly. Jordan smiled was blinding and Adam could feel that his heart hammering in his chest.

\---

Emre took a deep breath and combed his hair with his hand. The thing with Philippe was going into a positive direction, if not for the biggest obstacle in Emre’s life; Philippe’s friends. Emre didn’t understand that. At first, Moreno and Firmino seemed like they were supportive of him approaching Philippe. But as the time went by, they became the protective friends and decided to follow him and Philippe almost everywhere. They didn’t have time to get to know each other, for God’s sake. To make matter worse, Lucas was one of them. Emre didn’t realize that betrayal will feel this bitter.

Emre should have realized that Lucas must know Phil. They’re from Brazil, and it’s like unwritten rule here that people with the same nation stick together. It helped with the home sickness that usually happened to abroad student. That’s why Emre always found a time to hang around with Loris and Toni. Damn, Toni fucking Kroos.

Emre felt stupid that he didn’t realized this sooner. If someone could help Emre, it was Toni. Toni faced the same problem with him. His boyfriend, James Rodriguez, was a golden boy in here, an angel without wings, they said. Almost all students were fond of him, from the Spaniards to the Brazilian, and Toni faced hell when he approached James.

Emre turned his way and headed to the library. Usually, Toni was busy doing some projects or something at this hour. He scanned his eyes and bingo, Toni was sitting in the corner. He walked hurriedly and grinned when Toni looked up to see him.

“Hi, Emre.”

“Hi, Toni. I need your advice please.” Emre said hurriedly. Toni looked at him with blank expression and muttered, ‘what’.

Emre sat in front of Toni and started to tell his problem whether Toni wanted to hear or not. The latter just sighed and listened to Emre patiently. After felt like forever, Emre looked at him with a pained expression. “What the fuck should I do?”

Toni gave him a look full of pity and patted his shoulder. “You’re going to face hell, mate.”

Emre groaned. “Danke, Toni. That’s very helping.”

Toni stared at him with helpless expression and winced when he remembered the not so fond memories. “Don’t you hear about what happened to me when I tried to court James?”

“Court? Who says court this day?”

“I did. Just answer my question, Emre.” Toni replied impatiently. “You were given shovel talk by almost three quarter students in campus?”

“Fucking right. The only thing that make me strong is James.”

Emre looked at him with interest as he saw that Toni’s face soften whenever he talked about James. “What do you do to make his friends back off and accept you as James’ boyfriend?”

Toni shrugged carelessly and looked at Emre with honest expression. “I didn’t.”

Wait.

“What?”

“I didn’t do anything. I accepted whatever they did to me; made me bring them lunch, hang around with them, anything they said. I want to show them that I’m serious and if they wanted me to go through hell to get James, I’ll do it. In the end, James had had enough and shouted at them to back off, that he can make his own decision, and he likes me back. So, yeah, that’s it.”

Emre felt his jaws hanging open. “What? Wow, that’s so anti-climax, Toni.”

Toni looked offended and scoffed. “What the hell should I do? Fight them?”

“Yes!”

“I can’t fight three quarter of the campus’ population. I’m not gonna survive.”

“Damn, you’re lucky.”

“Eh, feels like it.”

“What the fuck should I do then?” Emre asked. Toni stared at him with confused expressions and shrugged carelessly. Emre punched his arm and felt satisfied when Toni winced. “Stop it, you fucktard.”

“What the hell should I do, Toni?!”

“Fine. I think you should talk to Coutinho.”

“Talk? Talk how?”

“Just ask if his friends have a problem with you and does Coutinho feel disturbed when you’re with him, or something like that.”

Emre groaned. “I would like to do that, but the problem is Phil is out of question right now.”

Toni furrowed his eyebrows. “Why?”

“He gets B+ in Mr. Mourinho’s class, and he is busy doing several assignments to remedy his grade.”

Toni whistled. “You sure he’s the one for you? Because in my opinion he’s way out of league.”

Emre looked offended and kicked Toni’s leg. “The fuck you mean?”

“He cares about his grade, Emre! Something that you never think about since elementary.”

“Fuck off.” Emre gave Toni a headlock and messed up his perfect hair. Toni gave an indignant yelp and tried to push Emre. Upon succeed, Toni fixed his hair and muttered, ‘asshole’.

Emre smirked.

\---

True to his words, Jordan did accompany Adam to his friend’s studio. When Adam said studio, Jordan thought his friend was a painter, or something like that. But no, Jordan Henderson never felt this shocked when he saw that Adam meant tattoo parlor with studio in it.

“Your friend has a tattoo parlor?” Jordan asked with disbelief.

Adam looked at him funny. “Yeah. Something’s wrong with that?” Adam pushed the door and didn’t wait for Jordan to follow him. Jordan rushed in and felt his jaw hanging open. The place was full with art. Some design for tattoo, some abstract, and many pictures that Jordan couldn’t describe. It’s mesmerizing.

Someone came out and grinned when he saw Adam, He was tall, sleeves full of tattoos, and incredibly handsome. He hugged Adam and chuckled. “Come here to add ink to your body, Ads?”

Adam grinned and shook his head. “Nah, I want to ask you for some advice actually.”

“You have a tattoo?!” Jordan shrieked, and he would never admit that he did that ever. Upon realizing that he interrupted rudely, he cleared his throat. “Sorry, I just.. ah..”

“Who’s this?” The man raised his eyebrow and he looked menacing.

“Ah, this my friend, Hendo. Hendo, this is Daniel Agger, but people calls him Dagger.”

Jordan shook Daniel’s hand and felt the latter looked at him with interest. “I never see you before. Usually Ads comes here the sweet couple.”

Jordan frowned at him and Adam gave an explanation. “Dele and Eric.”

Jordan’s face filled with realization. “Ah. Yes, I emm, just recently become Adam’s friend.”

Daniel looked at him with interest. “Hendo, right? Do your full name happen to be Jordan Henderson?”

Jordan looked surprised and nodded his head dumbly. Meanwhile, Adam felt panicked and dragged Daniel away from Jordan. As he walked away, he half-shouted to Jordan to go look around and entertained himself. Jordan looked at Adam retreating figure dumbly and felt awkward for a whole minute. He looked around the place and felt himself wondering what was Adam’s tattoo.

Daniel smirked when Adam stopped after dragged him out of Jordan earshot. “Don’t you say that you are enemy?”

Adam groaned and flushed at the same time. “Shut up, Dagger. It’s complicated.”

Daniel’s eyes soften and he decided to drop the subject. “What’s up?”

“I want your advice to draw animated object, real person.”

“You want to draw a real person?”

“Yeah. But every time I try, I feel my drawing is rubbish.”

Daniel scoffed. “Please, Ads. Your drawing is not rubbish.It’s just real person object has never been your forte.”

Adam shrugged. “Same thing. So, how do I practice? I feel like I practice a lot and still don’t satisfied with the result.”

Daniel appeared to be thinking and suddenly clasped his hands. “Wait here, I have some picture that you could try to recreate.”

Daniel came back to the front and saw Jordan walked around aimlessly. He took pity on him and texted his friend, Martin, to accompany him. He took a folder from the front desk and went back. He gave Adam the folder and saw Martin approached him. Martin usually spent his time sketching in Daniel’s studio. He was best friend with Martin since forever and Martin helped him with his tattoo parlor.

“What’s wrong, Dagger? Hey, Ads. Long time no see, yeah.”

Adam grinned and hugged him. “Yeah, it’s fucking long, mate. How you doing?”

Martin smiled and shrugged. “Never been better.”

“Hey, Mart. Can you please accompany Ads’ friend at the front while I discuss something here?”

Martin looked at him flatly and nodded. “Of course.” He walked away, leaving a guilty Adam and stoic Daniel.

“Shit. I abandoned Hendo, maybe later Dagger-“

“No, no. It’s fine. Martin can handle it. It’s been a long time, Ads. Tell me how's your feeling nowadays?” Daniel looked at him sharply, and Adam face softened. “I’m great, Dan.”

Dan looked at him with doubt and titled his head. “Really? You’re not lying, Ads?”

Adam shook his head and chuckled. “Nah. Not this time.”

Daniel smiled and ruffled Adam’s hair. “I’m glad to hear that. You know you’re like my little brother, and I know you’ve been struggling for the past years.”

Adam swatted his hand away and chuckled. “Stop that. You’re always bully me though.”

Daniel smirked. “Can’t help it.” Adam laughed and Daniel felt glad. He met Adam when he came to his parlor looking distraught and looked like he had been crying. Adam begged to gave him a tattoo anywhere and Daniel felt his heart tore apart. This boy was so broken that he begged him to tattooed him anywhere to replace the pain in his soul. Daniel ordered the boy to sit and asked him what happened. Since that day, Daniel became protective of this boy.

Daniel saw the way Adam kept stealing a glance towards the front and realized something. “It’s because of him, right?”

Adam turned his head so fast and looked a deer in the headlight. “What?”

“Hendo. He makes you happy.”

It’s not a question, but Adam still felt obligated to answer that. “Yeah. He is.”

Daniel smiled. “That’s wonderful. Now, I’ll give you some advice. Come here.”

\---

Jordan was so focused looking at the angel sketch that he was jumped when he realized that someone standing behind him. “Bloody hell.” He put his hand on his heart and felt himself flushed when the man chuckled.

“You’re jumpy boy, aren’t you?”

Jordan knew he should feel offended, but he was busy observing the man in front of him. He was almost as tall as Dagger, and his hands full of tattoo too. And what’s wrong with tattoo and bloody handsome men? He had a buzz cut and Jordan bet he can break Jordan’s bones easily if they were ever fight.

“Hey, I’m Martin Skrtel.” He offered his hand and Jordan took it cautiously.

Martin retracted his hand and laughed. “Easy there. I’m not gonna do anything to you.”

Jordan chuckled nervously. “Yeah? I’m not going to get tattoo. I just accompany my friend-“

“Ads. Yeah, I know.” Martin interrupted. “Come on. Let’s sit down and have a drink. Ads was busy with Dan for a moment, so I will keep you company.”

“Oh. Okay.”

Martin pointed him to a sofa in the corner and Jordan sat obediently.

“Is Coke okay?” Martin asked as he rummaged the refrigerator.

“Yeah, it is.”

Martin brought him Coke and they sat side by side with silent. Jordan sipped his Coke and struggled to find something to say. He didn’t have to though, because Martin beated him into it.

“I never see you before.”

Jordan looked up and put his Coke away. “Yeah. I ehm.. just recently become Ads’ friend.”

“I see. How do you meet Ads?”

Jordan fidgeted awkwardly and can’t help but felt that Martin was interrogating him. “We went to the same kindergarten, actually.”

Martin raised his thin eyebrows. “Really? You know him for a long time. How come you didn’t become friend before this?”

“It’s ehm.. he threw mud to my face on the first day, and I kind of got revenge and pushed him into puddle of mud.”

Jordan could felt blood crept up his neck and saw Martin looked at him with disbelief. “You’re Jordan Henderson.”

“Ah, yeah about that. How do you know my name?”

Martin smirked and shook his head. “Never mind. So, which football team do you support?”

Jordan shrugged. “Reds or dead, mate.”

Martin gave a satisfied slap to his shoulder. “Nice. You play sport?”

“Ehm, football.”

“Which position?”

“Midfield. How about you?”

Martin shrugged and sipped his Coke. “Football, as defender. I play ice hockey too.”

Jordan nodded politely. “Your accent and Dagger’s quite different. Where are you from if I may know?”

Martin chuckled. “Don’t be so formal, lad. It’s okay. Dan’s from Denmark, and I’m from Slovakia.”

Jordan chuckled awkwardly and cleared his throat while Martin laughed.

“You care a lot for Adam, am I right?” Martin said out of sudden. Jordan was startled and looked at Martin questioningly. Martin smiled. “Get one to know one, mate.”

“What? I don’t understand.”

“I can see your expression when you said his name, full of heart. They’re a lot of pining, aren’t they?”

Jordan groaned and covered his face. “Am I so transparent?”

Martin laughed and looked at him with amused expression. “No. I just can spot one when I see it.”

“Oh. And you feel the same way with...”

“Daniel.”

“Oh. And what’s your status right now?”

Martin shrugged. “Not sure. We’re friends, best friends. But we both know we’re more than that. Once I brought up the issue between us, Daniel retreated into his shell. I’m afraid of losing him, so I keep our relationship like this. Friends but it’s something more. Lovers but not quite like it. I don’t know what to call us.”

Jordan looked at him with understanding and sighed. “I get that, believe it or not. You want to push him but he runs away. You want to stay away but he chases you. So you stay in the middle. Can’t go up or down.”

“Yeah. Our relationship is complicated, with a lot of pining..”

“...Mixed signals...”

“...Lingering touch...”

“..and self control. Don’t forget about that.”

Both Jordan and Martin laughed and they felt that they’re not alone anymore.

“If you want to talk about Ads, you can see me, yeah. Maybe I can help you.” Martin said.

“Yeah, mate. You can talk to me too.”

Martin smirked. “The self control part is the hardest though.”

Jordan grinned from ear to ear. “With innocent face like that-“

“-and those lips-“

“-the way they say our names-“

“-just begging to be ruined-“

“-Bloody hell-“

“-Fuck this-“

Jordan and Martin groaned when their minds heading into dangerous territory.

“Isn’t it weird that we fantasize the same things even though with different person?” Jordan asked. Martin shrugged and shook his head. “Can’t blame us though.”

Jordan and Martin groaned again. That’s how Adam and Daniel found them, groaning like they were in pain and looked at each other with kind if understanding.

“What’s going on?” Adam asked curiously.

“Nothing.” Jordan muttered. “Are you finished?”

Adam nodded and looked at Daniel gratefully. “Thanks, Dagger. I’ll practice your suggestion.”

“Yeah, don’t push yourself too hard though.” Daniel clasped his shoulder and smiled.

Jordan and Martin got up and they clasped hand before Adam and he said goodbye, leaving a curious Daniel and Martin.

“Think he’s good for Ads, Martin?”

Martin eyes crinkled and he smirked. “He passed. For now.”

\----

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for all of you who read, kudos, and comment.  
> I'm really feel grateful because all of you.  
> I love you guys!!!
> 
> I don't have much knowledge about tattoo, or art for that matter. So, if I'm wrong, feel free to correct me. :)


	7. A Thousand Miles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “It’s complicated, Sir.”  
> “No, I want to hear. Better started while we’re young, lad.”  
> Mr. Gerrard leaned against the desk in front of him, and Emre started fidgeting. “I need a picture of Dele Alli using Liverpool scarf?”  
> Mr. Gerrard frowned got deeper and he looked at Emre like he was insane. “Dele isn’t a Liverpool fans.”  
> “I know, Sir.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm reaaaally sorry that it took so long.  
> But here it is.
> 
> And lovely Dingydong gave me a theme song for this story!! I'm so emotional.  
> Go check it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91brH8GVX90  
> It's wonderful.
> 
> This fic has no relation whatsoever with the real person mentions here.

Ever since Jordan knew that Adam has a tattoo, he couldn’t stop thinking about it. Jordan was curious what’s tattoo Adam has, and where is it. He tried to ask Adam directly, but the fucker just smiled teasingly at him and shrugged. Jordan really wanted to know. He blinked and realized he spaced out for a while. He sat on the bleacher watching Adam running. Jordan didn’t have football practice this afternoon, so he hang around the track field and watched Adam practiced. It sounded weird, and a little bit creepy come to think of it.

Jordan shook his head and focused his attention to Adam’s figure. Adam was beautiful when he’s running. To be honest, he always looked beautiful in Jordan’s eyes. Jordan observed him and smiled when he saw Adam was running with a blinding smile. Call him sentimental, but Jordan saw the way Adam’s face relaxed and happy when he ran, and Jordan felt a warm fuzzy feeling in his gut. He was glad that Adam was so free when he was running. It seemed he left all that bothering him behind.

Adam finished in the first place and Jordan clapped his hands. Adam turned his head and grinned widely to Jordan. Jordan felt his cheeks heated and grinned back.

_Bloody hell, I’m so screwed._

Jordan was waiting for Adam and scrolling his phone lazily. He saw that almost all of his friends gave Emre words of support in group chat and he wondered why. He hadn’t been around lately, and it seemed like Emre was in trouble. He was worried at first, but the more he read the conversation, he realized that almost all of them teased Emre. Must be something to do with Coutinho then. He felt someone was approaching him and looked up to see Adam smiled at him. Adam took a seat beside him and looked at him with that twinkle his eyes.

“Sorry I took so long.”

Jordan locked his phone and dismissed Adam’s apology. “Nah, it’s okay.”

They fell into silence, something that always happened whenever they met again after separated for sometime. It’s like they needed a minute to enjoy each other presence again. Eventually, Jordan cleared his throat and looked at Adam. “You are really good back then. When you were running.”

Adam chuckled and his cheeks turned pink. “Thanks, I guess. It’s not something awesome. I mean, I was just running.”

Jordan tsked and shook his head. “It’s not just running, Ads. Not everybody can run that fast, don’t belittle yourself.”

Adam looked taken aback at first, but then he looked happy and smiled warmly. “I think I should thank you for that.”

“What? Why me?”

“Remember when we were ten and you always stole something of mine? Then I always chased you to get it back. I think that’s why I can run really fast right now.” Adam grinned teasingly while Jordan groaned. “Fuck, I’m sorry that I was a jerk.”

Adam bursted out laughing and patted Jordan’s shoulder. “Don’t be. I’ve already said that you make me run faster.”

Jordan frowned. “I don’t think it’s because of me though. I practically do nothing!”

“No, it’s you, Hendo. I remember that I couldn’t catch you at first. You’ve already joined football team back then, and it got me like half an hour chasing you until the teacher intervened. I always practice after that, just so I can catch you and take back something of mine.”

Jordan chuckled. “I remember that now. At first you looked like you’re holding back tears because you can’t catch me. Then it got harder to get away from you. I had to climb a tree just so you can’t catch me!”

“I shouted and threw some falling branches at you until you gave up and threw my book. But then you can’t get off from the tree and the teacher had to bring a ladder!”

“That was very humiliating.” Jordan moaned. Adam laughed until his shoulder shook and tears rolled down his face. “That’s a really good memory.” Adam said.

“Glad that I could be your source of happiness.” Jordan said sarcastically. Adam was stunned for a moment, but he regained his composure immediately. He smiled at Jordan and looked directly into his eyes. “Thanks, Hendo.”

Jordan felt his cheeks got warm when Adam stared at him like that. “Eh, why did you say thanks? I should have been the one apologize to you because I always took your things back then.”

Adam chuckled but he didn’t answer Jordan’s question. Jordan used to Adam leaving things unanswered like that. He believed when the time was right, Adam would tell him eventually. Jordan just had had to be patient, and he would wait until Adam was ready. Jordan looked at Adam intently while the latter stared at the sky with a hints of smile on his lips. Jordan had a crazy urge to kiss Adam, and he had to looked away to prevent that. Jordan was playing with his phone when Adam leaned towards him.

“You have football practice tomorrow, right?” Adam asked. They were so close that Jordan could count Adam’s lashes. Jordan just nodded, didn’t trust his voice to speak.

“Can I watch?”

Jordan turned his head very fast and frowned. “Of course you can. Why can’t you?” Adam smiled sheepishly and rubbed his nose. “I’m afraid it’s a private practice or something.”

Jordan snorted. “Since when do we have a private practice?”

Adam looked offended but his smiled didn’t disappear. “Oh excuse me. I thought the football team are a bunch of cool guy that do not want to be watched when practice.”

Jordan scoffed and looked at Adam playfully. “You really think we’re cool? We’re just a bunch of dork really.”

Adam laughed. “Including you?” Jordan shrugged. “Including me.”

“Must be entertaining watching you guys practice tomorrow.”

“You should be ready with your phone. There always be one or two accident worth of blackmail.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

Jordan cleared his throat and looked away when Adam smiled blindly. “Ready to go home?”

Adam nodded and got up. Jordan followed him a moment later. Suddenly, Adam stopped and made Jordan collided with his back. “What?”

“We should take turn.” Adam said as he turned around.

“For what?”

“You always take me home. I think it’s the time I take you home.”

Jordan felt his heart hammering in his chest and he pulled Adam’s hoodie to cover Adam’s head. Adam yelped and watched as Jordan walked in front of him.

“That’s not gonna happen.” Jordan muttered.

“What? Why?”

“I don’t want something bad happen to you.”

“Nothing’s gonna happen. Besides, you can’t order me around. I’m older than you.”

“Doesn’t matter. You’re like a magnet for disaster, Ads.”

“I’m not.”

“You are.”

“I’m-“

“I remember seeing you came to school covered in bruises because you saved a cat!”

“Kitten, Hendo. And it was running towards the street, I had to do something!”

“We could argue about this all day, Ads. But I still walk you home.”

Adam was silent for a while, and Jordan was worried that he took this too far. Ever since he knew Adam better, he always worried about the older man. He was ready to apologize when he heard Adam huffed and whined. “Fine, captain. You can walk me home.”

Jordan grinned and Adam punched his arm while pouted. They walked in silence until Jordan nudged Adam shoulder. “I still want to know your tattoo.”

Adam stared at him playfully and smirked. “Why? Curious much?”

Jordan shrugged. “You can say that. The possibility that you get a tattoo has never cross my mind before.”

Adam looked at him questioningly. “Why is that?”

“Eh, you seem like an innocent person. I don’t know what to expect from you, actually.”

“Do I disappoint you?” Adam whispered and Jordan almost didn’t catch it. He stopped Adam and stared directly into his almond eyes. “Never, Ads. Remember that.”

Jordan resumed his walk like his declaration was not a big deal and Adam felt grateful for that. He jogged to catch up with Jordan and punched his shoulder playfully. “Maybe I’ll show you my tattoo later.”

Jordan smiled and Adam returned it. “Or maybe I can convince you to get one someday.”

Jordan chuckled. “Not gonna happen soon, mate.”

Adam grinned.

\---

Emre cursed when he saw Alby and Bobby wore an identical smirk. He was supposed to meet with Philippe in the library, but Philippe couldn’t make it because that stupid assignment from Mr. Mourinho. In order to apologize, Philippe sent his friends to accompany Emre. Truth to be told, Emre was fine by himself, he didn’t have to be accompanied really. Exception if it was Philippe. Now, Emre fidgeted in his seat while watched Alby and Bobby carefully.

Emre cleared his throat and started to speak. “You don’t have to stay here. I’m-“

“We’re not here because we want to accompany you, man.” Bobby interrupted. “It’s because Cou asked us, and we want to test you actually.” Alby continued.

Emre looked at them intently and determined to resolve this for good. “You guys dislike me.”

Bobby shrugged while Alby frowned. “We dislike everyone who tried to be close to Couti, actually.” Bobby stated. “But he likes you and we can do nothing about that.”

Emre frowned and looked at them like they were crazy. “I’m not gonna hurt Phil.”

Alby nodded. “Sí, we know. But we love Cou like a brother, and we don’t trust you. That’s why we are doing this.”

Emre looked lost and Bobby explained more. “You are one of the campus heartthrob. Do you realize how many students have a crush on you? Meanwhile, Phil was too pure for this world. We just want to make sure that Phil isn’t just a name on your list or something.”

Emre looked offended but he tried so hard to control himself. Alby and Bobby just wanted the best for Philippe, and Emre didn’t blame them for that. Philippe was really too pure for this world. “I can’t promise that I won’t hurt him, _unintentionally._ But I am serious when I said I like him. I would do anything to pass whatever the test you give for me.”

Alby and Bobby slowly smirked and looked at Emre like a predator looking at its prey. “You really would do anything?” Bobby asked.

Emre felt uneasy but decided that he would endure anything they threw at him for a pure human being named Philippe Coutinho. He nodded slowly.

Alby clasped his hands and beaming. “Great. We will give you list to do to pass the test, sí. You can complete that one per day. It’s not really hard.”

“You know if you want to be with Phil you will face us and maybe spend time together because we’re his best friends, right? Might as well started for now to see whether you can stand us or not.” Bobby added.

Emre nodded determinately and prepared himself for the worst. “Right. What should I do first?”

“Take a picture of Dele Alli using Liverpool scarf.”

What.

“What?! Are you guys crazy?” Emre practically shrieked. Bobby shrugged while Alby frowned. “It’s not that bad. Dele idolized Stevie, and Stevie is a die hard Liverpool fans. I don’t think he would mind.”

Emre almost tempted to tear his hair out and looked at them with disbelief. “Yeah, Dele maybe doesn’t mind. But he has the most possessive man as his boyfriend. And last time I check, Eric is not a Liverpool fans.”

“You should think about that by yourself. Don’t forget to take picture as proof. See you later, lad.” They got up and left a very speechless Emre behind. Emre swore in German and got up to find Dele and Eric. The sooner he finished this, the better. But first, he had to borrow a Liverpool scarf from Mr. Gerrard.

As Emre predicted, Mr. Gerrard frowned and demanded to know what it is for.

“It’s complicated, Sir.”

“No, I want to hear. Better started while we’re young, lad.”

Mr. Gerrard leaned against the desk in front of him, and Emre started fidgeting. “I need a picture of Dele Alli using Liverpool scarf?”

Mr. Gerrard frowned got deeper and he looked at Emre like he was insane. “Dele isn’t a Liverpool fans.”

“I know, Sir.”

“Why would you do that?”

“I ehm.. need it for proof?”

“Proof for what?”

“Ehm... that I like Philippe.”

Mr. Gerrard blinked and blinked again until Emre’s afraid he broke him. “Mr. Gerrard?”

“I don’t think understand the way you young people think nowadays. What’s the correlation between Dele using Liverpool scarf and the fact that you like Philippe?!”

“I know it’s absurd. But I have to do some tasks to prove that I like Philippe and would do anything for him. You remember Toni Kroos’ case right? It’s similar like that. I know I sound crazy, but please lend me the Liverpool scarf. I want to finish this task immediately and I don’t always bring my Liverpool scarf. But I know you always bring it, so you’re my only hope right now. Besides, I don’t even know if I’ll be succeed or not. It’s Eric Dier’s boyfriend we’re talking about and-“

“Whoa, lad. Calm down. Okay, I get it. But, I lend my Liverpool scarf to Xabi. Just ask him.” Mr. Gerrard cut off Emre’s babbling and looked at him with something resembling pity. Emre took a deep breathe and tried to compose himself. “So, I should ask Mr. Alonso?”

“Yep. I’ll call him and say that you really need it.”

“Thank you so much, Mr. Gerrard. I don’t know what I would do without you-“

“Yeah, yeah. Just go before Xabi teaches his next class.”

With final thanks, Emre practically ran and headed towards Mr. Alonso’ next class. As usual, Mr. Alonso came early to prepare anything for the class. He looked up when he saw Emre approaching and smiled. “I heard from Stevie that you need the scarf.”

Emre smiled sheepishly and nodded. “Yes. Sorry to bother you about it.”

Mr. Alonso took the scarf off from his neck and gave it to Emre. “No problem. Good luck, yes.”

Emre grinned and nodded. “Thanks, Sir. I really need that luck.”

Mr. Alonso chuckled. “Off you go, lad.”

Emre didn’t have to be told twice. He focused his attention to search a specific man and halted when he saw Dele was sitting under the tree. With Eric Dier. Emre went out and headed towards them. He could see Dele smiled curiously while Eric frowned.

“Hi, Can. What’s up?” Eric asked. Emre nodded his head and cleared his throat. “I need a favor.”

“What kind of favor?” Eric asked again before Dele could open his mouth. “Can you please wear Liverpool scarf and let me take a picture?”

“What?!” Eric shouted. Dele just looked stunned and confused.

“I’m sorry, I meant Dele. Just Dele.” Emre corrected. Eric got up and looked directly into Emre’s eyes. “What would he do that?”

Emre knew Eric would get defensive, and Emre understood. Eric didn’t get the title the most possessive and overprotective man for nothing.

“It’s not indicate anything, Dier. I just really need that picture for some reason.” Emre tried to reason with later just squinted his eyes and looked sharply at Emre. “I will disagree until you tell what the reason is. What are you playing at, Can?”

Emre groaned and looked at the sky while muttered, ‘Why it has to be so hard?”

“What’s that?” Dele asked curiously as he stood beside Eric. He was busy observed both of them interacted, but seeing the exasperated look on Emre’s face, Dele knew it’s not some cruel prank or something.

“I just need your picture wearing Liverpool scarf.” Emre was practically begged now, and Dele was ready to help him while Eric stepped up in front of him and practically shield him. “Whoa, hold on. I still want to know the reason. I don’t trust you, Can. No offense.”

Emre contemplated to tell them or not. Come to think of it, Alby and Bobby didn’t say that he couldn’t anybody about the task. Besides, Mr. Gerrard and Mr. Alonso had already known. Fuck that.

“Fine. I am in a quest right now.”

Eric and Dele looked at him blankly until Dele asked with disbelief tone. “Quest?”

“I was given task to do to prove that I genuinely like Philippe and will do anything for him. And taking Dele’s picture wearing Liverpool scarf happens to be the first task.”

They were silent upon hearing that and looked at Emre with identical judging look. “You’re joking.” Eric stated.

Emre tempted to tear his hair out but decided not to because he didn’t want to deal with a messed up hair later. “I’m not.”

“Is it gonna be like the whole ‘Kroos-Rodriguez’ fiasco again?” Dele asked. Emre nodded enthusiastically, happy that they starting to get it.

“Fine. We’ll help you. But you owe us, Can.” Eric finally said. Emre agreed and gave Dele the scarf. Dele wore it immediately while Eric watched with distaste.

“Do you want me to pose or something?”

“It’s up to you.”

“Whose scarf is it by the way? Is it yours? Do you carry Liverpool scarf around every day?” Dele asked curiously while Emre prepared to take his picture. “It’s Mr. Gerrard’s.”

“What?” Dele asked with stunned expression. It’s not a secret that he idolized Mr. Gerrard, and Eric was not happy about it. While Dele looked at the scarf like it was precious, Eric yanked it forward and kissed Dele.

Dele was stunned, but he melt into the kiss eventually. Eric left him breathless and didn’t realize that Emre was with them until he cleared his throat. “Ehm, thanks for the picture, lads. I get lucky that I could capture your intimate moment.”

Dele blushed while Emre smirked. It looked like that Eric was going to kiss Dele again and Emre was quick to intervene. “Woah, before you make out again, please return the scarf. I have to return it to Mr. Alonso.”

Emre took off the scarf and gave it to Emre. “I thought you said it is Mr. Gerrard’s.”

“It is. It just happens to be lent to Mr. Alonso. Thanks again. I’m going.”

Upon seeing Emre walked away, Eric pushed Dele towards the tree and trapped him with his hands. “I hate it when you get all bright eyes and smiley when talking about Mr. Gerrard.”

Dele smiled at him and felt his breath hitched. “Jealous much?”

“You have no idea.” With that final words, Eric kissed Dele again and they made out like they’re the only people in the world.

\---

Philippe looked at Alby and Bobby innocent face with distrust. “What did you do?”

Both Alby and Bobby looked offended and started to defend themselves. “What makes you think we did anything?” Bobby asked.

Philippe sighed exasperatedly and rubbed his nose. “I know you guys since forever. I know your behaviors when you two did something bad. What is it?”

Alby looked at him with puppy eyes and almost pouted. “We don’t do anything!”

“Is it Emre? Please tell me you didn’t do anything bad to him.” Philippe begged. “I haven’t seen him for awhile because this stupid assignment. What if he gets bored of waiting and doesn’t want to talk to me again?”

“Whoa, Phil. There’s a lot of wrong things on your theory. First, we didn’t do anything _bad_ to Emre-” Bobby said.

“-and second, he would never get bored of you.” Alby finished.

Philippe looked at their serious face and cracked a smile. “Really? You guys think so?”

“Yeah, we are. Now go finish that stupid assignment of yours.”

Philippe smiled gratefully and walked away. As soon as he disappear from their sight, Alby turned towards Bobby and clasped his hands. “We need to give Emre all of the task before Philippe finishes his assignment.”

Bobby smirked. “Sure things.”

Alby returned the evil smirk and they fisted bump. Hell just got started for Emre Can.

\---

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all of you!!  
> I really love you allll!!!  
> I couldn't say how much you read my story, kudos and comment mean for me.  
> Thanks again! :*


	8. By Your Side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adam felt his life starting to get ridiculous ever since he befriend Jordan Henderson.
> 
> “Henderson looks very hot today!”
> 
> “Damn right. Looked at that arms!”
> 
> “Can’s hair is so fluffy and loose today. Gorgeous.”
> 
> What.
> 
> Chapter 8 Update.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thank you everyone who still read this, give me kudos, and comment even though I didn't give the update in the last chapter.  
> I love you guys *give free hugs*  
> Let's forget the transfer saga for a moment, shall we?  
> Sorry for the ridiculousness, I felt my head is kind of messed up right now.
> 
> This story doesn't have anything to do with the real person.

Adam sat on the bleacher watching the football team practice with the big smile on his face. Jordan wasn’t kidding when he said the footballers were a bunch of dorks. Currently, he watched Emre following Dejan everywhere while the latter tried so hard to get away.

Jordan looked at them with exasperated expression while Eric dragged Dele far away from them. They were talking so loud that Adam could hear the conversation clearly. Emre was bothering Dejan about hair gel.

“Come on, Dejan. Please put some gel on my hair!”

“No! What the fuck is this about?”

“Don’t you hear? I’m on a quest right now.”

“What kinds of quest that required hair gel?!”

“My quest! I can’t put hair gel on for a day.”

Dejan frowned and looked around for help. All of them looked at him with pity and amusement, and nobody wanted to intervene. Dejan stared at them with betrayed expression. “A day without hair gel wouldn’t kill you,” Dejan almost shouted, but Emre ignored him.

“I couldn’t concentrate in practice with my hair get all floppy like this.”

“You play football with your feet, what the fuck it has to do with your hair?!”

Seeing that Dejan almost hit Emre, Jordan was quick to intervene. A bit late actually, but Jordan didn’t want to menddle in silly argument like this, what with Adam sitting on the bleacher. “Okay, lads. Break it off. Go stretching with Lucas, Dejan. I will handle it.”

Dejan was quick to get away, leaving Jordan looked at Emre with desperation while the latter pleaded with his eyes. “ What’s this about, Em?”

“It’s part of the quest.”

“From Alby and Bobby?” Emre nodded. Jordan sighed and rubbed his nose. “I know it’s hard, Em. I know how much you addicted to the hair gel, I do too! But I think you should keep fighting. Remember Philippe.”

Upon finished saying that, Jordan could hear Adam snorted and laughed clearly and he regretted his choice of words immediately. Who the fuck admitted that they addicted to a fucking hair gel?! Emre seemed like in a deep thought for a moment and finally sighed. “You’re right. I’ll do anything for Phil. I just have to distract myself from my hair today. Easier said than done, but-“

“Em, look behind you. I think you’re source of distraction is coming.”

Emre turned around abruptly and felt his smile blooming when he saw Philippe came and sat beside Adam. Emre gave a little wave which made Philippe blushed and waved back shyly. Emre patted Jordan’s shoulder and went to practice without a fuss. Jordan looked at him with disbelief and felt embarrassed when he saw Adam smiled broadly and waved his phone. He must be recorded all of it, that fucker, Jordan gave a single wave and continued leading his teammates to practice.

Adam snorted and suddenly realized that Philippe was watching him with a glint on his eyes. Adam pocketed his phone and cleared his throat awkwardly. “Is there something on my face?”

Phil shook his head but still smiling like he knew something that Adam didn’t know. After several moments of silent, Philippe talked. “You seem happy, happier.”

Adam looked taken aback and looked at Phil with confusion. “What do you mean by that?” Phil smiled softly and chose to stare at the field.

Philippe has known Adam since freshman year. Adam was a sophomore back then, and Philippe had just joined the track team. He was a shy person, but then Adam always be there for him. He’s like a brother figure for him, took him under his wings and always care about his teammates. Adam felt like a ray of sunshine until Phil saw something he wasn’t supposed to see. It was in the middle of October, and the track team had a practice that afternoon. After practice was over, everybody was hurry to leave to avoid the cold weather. The thing was, Philippe forgot his phone in his locker and cursed himself before going back to pick it. He thought nobody there until he heard someone was sobbing.

Philippe was scared at first, what if it was a ghost or something? But curiosity won and he decided to search the source of it. He was surprised when he saw a familiar figure sat against the locker in the hidden corner of the room. Philippe was quick to hide between the locker and he listened carefully. He heard that Adam was sobbing, and it was heart breaking. How come that someone so cheerful like Adam was actually hiding a great pain? Philippe stood silently for maybe like a minute, or half an hour, he lost the track of time. He didn’t know what to do, he wanted to help but how? Philippe was tensed when he heard Adam stopped and passed him without noticing. He let out a sigh and felt his heart ache for Adam. What can he do for him?

Philippe never told that accident to anybody and decided to watch Adam for sometimes. It was a private matters and Philippe felt like he was intruding enough. He wanted to help, but had no idea how. That’s why he was glad when he saw Adam was happier with Jordan. They always had the weird chemistry between them and who knows that they were better when they were friends.

Philippe was out of his daydreaming when he heard several students took a seat several benches beside them. They looked excited, but he didn’t know why. He shared a curious look with Adam and decided to focus to the football team again.

“Henderson looks very hot today!”

“Damn right. Looked at that arms!”

“Can’s hair is so fluffy and loose today. Gorgeous.”

What.

Both Phil and Adam could hear their conversation very clearly and looked at each other awkwardly.

“Who do you think the dominant one between Alli and Dier?” One of them asked excitedly. His friends rolled their eyes like it was obvious. “Duh, it’s Dier. Look at that alpha male attitude whenever he was with him.”

“Bet Henderson is the alpha male too!”

What. The. Hell.

Adam looked at the ground and felt himself blushing. He didn’t have to hear that! Philippe looked at him with pity and felt his face heated when he heard they talked about Emre. “Emre Can is sooo beautiful. I couldn’t get enough of seeing him.”

“I prefer Lovren. He looks badass.”

“Mignolet is mine! He’ll always be my number one.”

“I don’t want to choose. I’ll take all of them.”

“No way! Pick one for yourself.”

“Sturridge or Clynes then.”

“Fine. You can take two.”

“Why our football team players are sooo gorgeous?! It’s supposed to be a sin to look so stunning.”

“And their bodies. Fuck, their bodies.”

“Bet they could manhandle someone so easily.”

“Fuck! I want to be manhandled by Henderson.”

Bloody hell. What the fuck is wrong with this people?!

Adam felt himself blushing beyond control and surprised that he’s not fainted yet. Beside him, Philippe was grimaced when he heard their conversation was starting to breach inappropriate border. His face was red like Adam and was contemplating if it’s rude to stay away from them so abruptly.

“Guys! Henderson takes his shirt off!”

Adam looked up on reflex and felt his heart hammering when he saw that they were right. He heard they were squealing, and Adam felt his mouth went dry. Fuck, they were right. Hendo is so fucking gorgeous. Adam looked away and stood abruptly. “I think I will go get some water.”

“I’ll come with you!” Philippe was quick to follow as he heard more things that he didn’t want to know about his friends. They didn’t take some water, but went to the small garden beside the school and sat against the tree. Both of them had gone very red and looked at each other awkwardly. “Phil, please promise me that we would never talk about that.”

Philippe nodded his head solemnly. They stared again for sometimes and burst out laughing. “It was one of awkward moment in my life!” Philippe shouted histerically. Adam wiped tears from his face from laughing so much. “I know! I don’t know how I could face them after this.”

Philippe agreed about that wholeheartedly and sighed. He supposed to watch Emre because he remembered that Emre asked him to. There’s no match day for sometimes, so Philippe could only watch Emre when practicing. Besides, he was busy because of Mr. Mourinho’s assignment, and he hadn’t finished that by the way. Philippe sighed again and felt someone patted his head.

“Stop sighing so much, Phil. You’ll older faster because of that.”

Philippe snorted and looked at twinkle in Adam’s eyes. “You should take your own advice, Ads.”

Adam chuckled. “I’m not the one sighing every five minutes or so.”

Philippe pouted, something that he would deny till the day he dies. Adam laughed and shook his head fondly. “We should go back before they realize we’re gone. Emre must be looking for you. Then he couldn’t focus on training and irritate all of his teammates.”

“What? I don’t to go back yet. I still traumatized because of what happened.” Philippe whined. Adam looked at him fondly and decided to stay for a while. The weather was a little bit cloudy, but it is alright. They kept silent for awhile until Philippe cleared his throat. “Ads, is it true?”

Adam frowned and looked at him with confused expression. “What true?”

“That Emre does anything Alby and Bobby said because of me?” Philippe looked at him with such an innocent expression and Adam frowned deeper. “Does nobody tell you?”

“I heard some vague rumour, but every time I asked someone about that they refused to tell me anything. Even Bobby and Alby. Is it true?”

“I think so.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Emre doesn’t have to do all that trouble things for me.”

Adam looked taken aback and cleared his throat awkwardly. “I think you should talk with Emre about that, Phil. To be honest, I’m not the right person to be asked about matters like this. Sometimes even I don’t understand why people do something just for the sake of my comfort or happiness.”

Philippe looked at him like he could see right through his soul and Adam unrealized that he started fidgeting. It happens only for a span of seconds and Philippe took a deep breath. “You’re right. I should ask Emre about that.”

“Ask me what?”

Both Adam and Philippe shrieked, something they would be deny for like forever. They were busy chilling and didn't realized that they stayed there for a long time.

“Damn, Can. Don’t creep on people like that!” Adam scolded him and Emre just grin and decided to sit beside Philippe. “Not my fault that you guys decided to gossip like a granny. Now, ask me what?”

Philippe smiled awkwardly and rubbed his nose to calm his nerves. Sensing that he better be off, Adam stood up and nodded to them. “Right, I’ll just give you some privacy. See you guys.”

As Adam walked off, Emre shouted loudly. “You just want to meet your future boyfriend!”

Adam blushed and flipped him a finger. Emre chuckled and looked at Philippe who wouldn’t stop rubbing his nose. “Are you okay, Phil?”

Philippe almost squeaked and nodded shyly. Emre looked at him with concern and Philippe decided to rip the bandage once for all. “Is it true that Bobby and Alby give you a list of thing to do?”

Emre looked a deer caught in a headlight for a second but he schooled his face into a neutral expression. “What do you mean?”

“I heard some rumour, that you would do anything for me. It’s like that whole Kroos-Rodriguez fiasco again. Is it?”

Emre looked away and that confirmed Philippe suspicion.

“Why?” Philippe asked softly. There’s no accusation in his tone, it’s just a mix of disbelief and curiosity, and Emre felt his heart melted. Things like this that made Emre like Philippe, sweet, selfless Philippe. Always think about other people rather than himself.

“It is.” Emre answered proudly and Philippe frowned. “You don’t have to trouble yourself like this.”

“I don’t feel troubled, Philippe.”

“But you don’t have to proof anything to me! I never think that you have bad intention when you want us to be friend. It’s-“

“Philippe, listen. Alby and Bobby do it because they care so much about you. They want the best for you, and if giving absurd things to do ease their mind about me, I will do it again in a heartbeat.”

Philippe stunned and felt himself overwhelmed with so many emotions raging from fondness, disbelief, happiness, and he couldn’t help but to like the man in front of him evermore. Emre waited Philippe’s reaction with anticipation and felt the knot in his stomach going loose when Philippe chuckled.

“You’re impossible.”

Emre grinned. “Part of my charm.”

Philippe couldn’t help chuckled again and felt himself giddy with happiness. “What kinds of thing that have you done for them so far?”

Emre shrugged. “Not much. It’s just my second task.”

“I want to know. Tell me please?”

“I don’t think I can tell you about my quest. Your friends would kill me if they know.”

“It can be our little secret.” Philippe looked at him with puppy eyes and Emre felt his defense crumbled. “Fine, I’ll blame you when they kill me. I will.”

“They wouldn’t kill you. Come on, I’m dying to know here.”

“The first task is give them picture of Dele Alli using Liverpool scarf.”

Philippe looked at him with disbelief. “Alli isn’t a Liverpool fans.”

“I know. That’s why it’s a little bit crazy to say the least.” Emre then told Philippe about how he borrowed Mr. Gerrard’s scarf to finish the task as soon as possible, which lead him to Mr. Alonso, and the fact that he had to face Eric Dier before got the picture of them snogging under the tree.

Philippe laughed while Emre groaned theatrically while remembering what happened. Philippe was breathless because of laughing so much and he took a deep breath before asking what the next task is.

“I couldn’t put on a hair gel for a day.”

“That’s why your hair is floppy today.” Philippe came with a dawned realisation and watched Emre kind of blushing. “I know, it’s really floppy and I feel weird because of that.”

Philippe smiled softly. “It suits you. You still look cool though.”

Emre watched Philippe with fond expression and couldn’t help blurted out ‘Damn it, Phil. Stop making me like you even more’, which left Philippe with a red face.

\---

Adam found Jordan in the stadium entrance looking fresh after showering. His hair was not dried yet and Adam couldn’t help the heat that creeped up his face. Jordan looked at him with curiosity and Adam thought it must be because his face was red.

“Where are you and Philippe going? Emre was slipped in the middle of running when he realized you two not on the bleacher anymore.”

Adam’s eyes widened upon remembering why he and Philippe flee in the first place. “It’s nothing!” Adam felt like punching his face when he squeaked out of reflect and Jordan looked at him with frowned on his face. “Did something happen?”

“NO! I’m not going to talk about that with you, Henderson! Never!” Adam walked away while his hands made a wild gesture, shook his head repeatedly, and muttered under his breath. Jordan watched the way Adam acted crazy and decided to confront about this latter. He had a hunch whatever made Adam like that, he really didn’t have to know. Jordan walked slowly behind Adam and gasped when the latter turned around so abruptly.

“Bloody hell, Ads. Give some warning, will ya.”

“Let’s go get ice cream.” Adam blurted out. Jordan looked at him with curiosity laced with worry. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Adam pulled Jordan’s hand and dragged him to the nearest Ice Cream Parlour, bought both of them green tea flavoured ice cream and sat in the nearest bench. Adam gave Jordan his share and starting to eat and focused solely to her ice cream. Jordan was ready to ask whether Adam was okay – _once again-_ when Adam interrupted him. “Don’t start to ask whether I’m okay or not, Jordan Brian Henderson. I swear my head is a mess right now and I need a peaceful situation to make my brain useful again, so God help me don’t ask because I feel I’m going crazy right now.”

Jordan felt his jaws dropped but decided to humour him. So, he ate his ice cream in silence but didn’t stop to look at Adam every few minutes or so. Adam felt what happened before affected him more than he realized and decided to try something. He counted to three and looked up to check whether he attracted to Jordan and felt his breath punched out of his lungs when he saw Jordan looked at him intensely. He cleared his throat and decided to focus to other things, like how Jordan’s biceps did look really strong and-

_Bad Adam!_

Adam stood up abruptly and talked in a hurry. “I have to go.” He left Jordan without a glance, leaving Jordan sat dumbfounded and confused as hell.

\---

Adam was trying so hard to avoid Jordan and so far he’s been successful for three days straight. He knew he couldn’t run forever, but he became aware of Jordan presence, habit, attitude, personality, and if Adam had to mention things that he aware of Jordan Henderson, it could take a lot of time. Adam watched from a far how Jordan would try to make himself smaller every time someone praised him, how when he walked he gave out a calmness aura, and when he troubled he would frown and his look would become serious as hell.

Adam always thought he knew Jordan better than anyone else, but he surprised when he realized it didn’t true at all. When he listened people talked about Jordan when he was practicing made Adam realized that he didn’t know really much about the other man. Yes, Adam knew a lot more about Jordan, but it usually something embarrassing or general facts that almost everybody knows. Adam didn’t want to be everybody, he wanted to put attention to Jordan, someone who always there for Adam when he needed it. Adam wanted to be _friend_ that always there.

Someone cleared his throat and Adam was out of his daydreaming. He looked up and saw Xabi watched him with twinkle in his eyes and a small smile.

“Class is over, Ads. You can go.” Xabi said playfully. Adam looked around and felt himself blushing when he realized the class was empty. He cleared his throat and smiled sheepishly. Upon tidied up his books, he stood up but decided to sit in front of Xabi. “Sir, can I ask you something?”

Xabi looked at him with curiosity and nodded his head. “Sure, Ads. You can ask me anything,”

“Okay. How is it feel like when you first see Mr. Gerrard?”

Xabi scrunched his nose and tilted his head. “I’m not sure I understand what you mean, Ads.”

“I mean, how is it feel like when you realize that you like him?”

Xabi’s face dawned with realization and he smiled softly. “It was crazy. I was a mess, I don’t know how to act around him, I became aware of everything he did, and my face couldn’t stop blushing.”

Adam chuckled awkwardly when he realized that he felt _exactly_ like that around Jordan. Xabi looked at him with understanding and Adam felt the strong urge to cry. “But I just starting to become his friend and I’m still getting use to that. I’m not ready to be more than that?!”

Xabi frowned. “Does Jordan force you to be in a relationship with him?”

Adam looked horrified. “No! He would never do that.”

“He asked you to be his boyfriend?”

“What? No. As far as I know, he doesn’t know I’m starting to have this strange feeling towards him.”

Xabi looked confused. “Then what’s the problem, Ads?”

Adam looked stunned and thought back to why he was freaking out in the first place. “I’m…not sure, sir.”

“Take a deep breath, Ads. What spur on this realization?”

Adam remembered that blasted day on the bleacher and starting to ramble. “It’s the fault of people that came to watch the football team practice. Their topic started innocent enough, but then they started talking about how Jordan could manhandle someone, how he looks so hot and now I’m agree with them because they’re right and I couldn’t help but thinking how someone like Jordan could like someone like me and now I watch him like a stalker and realized that Jordan has a lot of side that I don’t know. I want to know more about him, how he likes his breakfast, why he always uses so much hair gel, and why he always cut his apple into two before eat it. But that doesn’t mean I’m ready for a commitment but you’re also right. He doesn’t know I like him, but I’m pretty sure he knows now since I acted like this lunatic towards him.”

Adam breathed harshly but somehow Xabi looked calm as hell. “Are you feeling better now, Ads?”

Adam took a deep breath. “Yes, I think I’m good. Rambling about this matters help me somehow.”

“Good. Now, I don’t think Jordan realizes you like him.”

“What? Why?”

“Jordan wouldn’t realize that. He will be more concerned about your well-being. Trust me on this, Ads.”

Adam frowned. “How can you be so sure?”

“Trust me. He’s almost like Stevie for matters like this.” Xabi said calmly.

\---

“I think I did something wrong, Stevie. If not, why Adam was avoiding me like a plague?”

Stevie frowned and looked at Jordan with confused expression. “You sure you don’t remember what happened before he started to avoiding you?”

“No! I remembered he acted strangely when we ate ice cream, but just that.”

“And what’s the symptom again?”

“His face was red, he looked like he was trembling, and he squeaked every time he nears me.”

Stevie frowned got deeper. “That’s strange. Except the squeaking, he might be caught a little cold.”

Jordan sighed dramatically and pulled his hair frustratingly. “What should I do?”

“Gave him your jacket, bring him home, and make some tea for him. That’s always work with Xabi.”

Jordan looked thoughtful for a moment. “Right. Thanks for your advice, Stevie. I appreciate it. Now, I’ll go looking for Adam.”

“Kay. Good luck, lad.”

Jordan went without a glance and Stevie hoped for the best for him. Something nagging in his mind, but he shrugged it off and starting to pack up. He’ll talk to Xabi about this later.

It didn’t take Jordan a long time to find Adam because he was waiting in the front gate. Adam still looked flushed, but he looked somewhat normal.

“Hey, Hendo.”

Jordan sighed a breath of relief when Adam talked to him. “Are you okay?”

“I think so. Sorry for making you worry. Let’s walk home together. Hendo, what are you doing?” Adam watched Jordan took of his jacket and wrapped Adam tightly with it.

“I’m glad you’re feeling better. But I don’t want you to get sick again. Come on, I’ll make you a cup of tea when you come home.”

Adam was stunned and the only thought that crossed his mind was _‘Damn, Mr. Alonso was right.’_

\---

 

p

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How is it? I don't feel satisfied with this chapter.  
> Thankfully, I have bought a new laptop. So, I think I can update this fic regularly since now.
> 
> Your thought, please?


	9. It Will Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What’s with the long face?” Adam asked curiously. It’s a rare sight for Dele. He was always the charming happy go lucky person, unless he had a fight with his boyfriend, that is.
> 
> “Kroos and Rodriguez broke up.”
> 
> Adam was choking upon hearing the news. He made the mistake of drinking while waiting for Dele to speak up. “What do you mean with broke up?!”
> 
> “Their relationship. Over. The end. Separated.” Dele answered with monosyllable and honestly it was making Adam annoyed. People here tend to ship almost whoever they want, and Kroos-Rodriguez was popular enough that almost half of the college ship them. Adam and Dele included.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I'm back.  
> I'm sorry it took soooo long and honestly I don't have any reason for that except I have a writer block and I kind of overthinking about my life recently, so yeah.  
> Thank you very much for all of you readers, I love you sooo much.
> 
> Chapter title was taken from It Will Rain - Bruno Mars  
> This fic has no relation whatsoever with the people mentions here. This is made for fun only.

It’s been a week since Adam realized that he wanted to know more about Hendo. A week full of realization and embarrassing moments, yet Adam was grateful that it happened. He felt almost normal around Hendo now, after realizing that Mr. Alonso was right and Hendo really had no clue about his growing attraction towards him. Today felt like a good day, until he saw the sullen face of one Dele Alli. Adam was frowning while watching Dele took a seat in front of him.

“What’s with the long face?” Adam asked curiously. It’s a rare sight for Dele. He was always the charming happy go lucky person, unless he had a fight with his boyfriend, that is.

“Kroos and Rodriguez broke up.”

Adam was choking upon hearing the news. He made the mistake of drinking while waiting for Dele to speak up. “What do you mean with broke up?!”

“Their relationship. Over. The end. Separated.” Dele answered with monosyllable and honestly it was making Adam annoyed. People here tend to ship almost whoever they want, and Kroos-Rodriguez was popular enough that almost half of the college ship them. Adam and Dele included.

“From whom are you hearing this impossible news?” Adam demanded.

“Everybody. Someone said Rodriguez are going to go to Germany. Can you believe that?”

“That doesn’t mean they broke up.” Adam argued. “What makes you think they’re not?” Dele shot back.

“It could be temporary. Besides, Kroos’ home is in Germany. What’s the problem?”

“Ads, distance is a tricky factor. They could try to make it work at first, but eventually they will feel exhausted. Wanting someone they love to be close but they couldn’t. They have a different life, and their lover wouldn’t be a big part of them anymore. They would see a different city, people, hell even different coffee shop. Thinking every minute how they wish theirs are standing there with them, watching the same thing. It’s a scary situation.”

Adam looked at Dele with understanding and smiled sadly. “Dele. It’s beyond personal, isn’t it?”

Dele looked away and picked on his food. “What’s the matter? You know you can talk to me.” Adam said gently. Dele looked like he had an internal debate between himself, but sighed eventually. “You know Eric has an exciting life before he met me. He lived in Portugal since he was child and I know he loves it. It’s silly, but I always think what if Eric choose to go back there someday and leave me? What would I do when that day come, Ads?”

Dele looked lost and to be honest, Adam couldn’t answer that question. They’re talking about hypothetical situation, but Adam knew that it had been bothering Dele for a long time. Adam didn’t want to dismiss something like this as he often thinks about hypothetical situation and get stressed out because of it. Adam knew how Dele felt right now, but he couldn’t give any answer that could ease Dele’s mind. Dele should talk to Eric about his insecurities as it was between both of them. Before Adam could say anything, Eric came and sat right beside Eric. Dele stared at Adam with a sharp eyes and Adam knew he should stay silent.

“Hey, I’ve been searching for you almost everywhere.” Eric said to Dele, and frowned immediately when Dele didn’t answer and keep on picking his food. “What’s the matter with you?”

“Nothing.” Dele answered flatly. Eric turned his body towards Dele and put a hand on his shoulder. “You’re sulking and I want to know why. What’s wrong?”

“I just said nothing!” Dele refused to look at Eric while Eric looked startled and put down his hand. “Fine, go sulking.” He focused his attention towards Adam and frowned deeper. “Why you look like someone kill your dog, Ads?”

Adam looked like a deer in a headlight and cleared his throat while trying to answer Eric’s question. “Ehm.. I’ve just heard that Kroos and Rodriguez are separated?”

Eric nodded. “They are. Rodriguez will move to Germany.”

Adam felt his jaw dropped. “It’s true?!”

Eric stared at Adam calmly and nodded. “It is. Why?”

“Nothing. I just… I don’t know. Why are they breaking up?”

“Maybe they think it’s the best for them right now.” Eric shrugged. Adam shoulder slumped. “Maybe.”

“Why are you the one who looks very disappointed?” Eric demanded. Adam flushed and shook his head. “It’s just, I thought they will try to make the long distance relationship work. I never once imagine that I would see them breaking up.”

Eric smiled gently. “You’re a sap, Ads.” Adam sputtered and would retort back when Dele interrupted him. “You wouldn’t think it’s a big deal, would you?”

Eric looked taken aback while Adam felt something bad gonna happen. “What do you mean by that?”

“Tell me, is it easy for you to leave someone behind?” Dele demanded. Eric grow confused and looked at Dele with disbelief. “What is it about?”

“Just answer me.”

“It’s not. What– “

“If you have to leave me, would you breaking up with me too? Thinking it’s the best for us?” Dele demanded. Eric face dawned with realization and his face hardened. “You think I would leave you in the first place?”

“You can’t promise me forever Dier, I know it’s impossible. I just want to know when the time comes, what would you choose?”

Eric laughed harshly. “ _When_ the time comes? You really sure that I would leave you someday, huh? After all this time, I can’t believe you don’t trust me.”

“It’s not about trust, Dier. It’s–“

“Then tell me what’s this is about, Dele. Tell me after all this time we’re together, you don’t think about me leaving. Say it to my face right now.”

Dele stunned to see Eric lost his temper but couldn’t say anything back in return. The truth was Dele always thinking about Eric leaving him. It plagued him like an endless nightmare and he didn’t know how to get rid of it. Seeing as Dele kept silent, Eric sets his jaw and shook his head. “I can’t believe it.”

He stood abruptly, leaving the place without a glance back while Dele hung his head dejectedly. Adam watched the scene with heavy breathing and felt twisted in his stomach. He didn’t like seeing something like this, but he’s powerless to do something. How he wished that Jordan were here.

The heavy silent was surrounding them until Dele spoke softly. “I ruin it, right Ads?”

Adam took a deep breath. “You guys will be OK.”

“I’m going home. Cover for me, please?” Dele asked without waiting for an answer and left. Adam watched him go with a sad smile and prayed that everything will be fine in the end.

\---

“I heard what happened between Alli and Dier today.” Jordan said as he sat on the grass beside Adam. Adam nodded while kept looking straight ahead. “People tend to notice problem that isn’t their own. I’m not surprised it took an hour for the news to get big.”

Jordan nodded and watched Adam intently. “I also heard about Kroos and Rodriguez.” Adam hummed. “Sorry I am not with you when Alli and Dier had a fight.”

Adam turned his head abruptly. “It’s not your fault. You have nothing to blame yourself for.” Jordan smiled. “I know. But at least if I were there, you don’t have to be alone and maybe I could be the voice of the reason.”

Adam stunned and whispered softly. “What?”

“I know you hate confrontation, Ads. You’re tough, you can face it when it comes to yourself, but you hate it when people you care about fight.”

“How- how do you know that…”

Jordan looked away and blushed. “Gut feeling maybe.”

Adam stared at Jordan curiously and felt butterfly fluttered in his stomach. “That’s feel a little too specific for a gut feeling.”

“It’s just, I feel like I just know when it comes to you, Ads.” Jordan mumbled. Adam chuckled and smiled softly. “You must know that I hide a lot of feeling then?”

Jordan froze hearing that. He knew Adam hid a lot of emotion behind his smile, and he never brought it up because he wanted Adam to trust him to tell it himself. Hearing Adam brought the issue about himself made Jordan warm all over his heart. He nodded slowly and tried to made out Adam emotion. Adam frowned and looked like there’s a war between himself. He took a deep breath and looked Jordan in the eyes. “Hendo, I’m sorry that I still couldn’t talk to you about myself, _yet._ It’s not you, it’s me. I just… I don’t know… I-“

Jordan stayed silent and waited patiently for Adam to sort out his mind. “I’ll tell you when I’m ready. Is it okay?”

“I’ll wait Ads. And remember that I’ll always be here when you need me.” Jordan answered without missing a beat and Adam felt his body sagged with relief. He smiled as to say ‘thank you’ and Jordan smiled back.

Adam looked away and cleared his throat awkwardly. “Where are you this morning, by the way? You don’t have class and you told me something’s urgent going on.”

Jordan groaned and Adam looked at him amused. “You know I accompany Emre walked Alberto’s dog.”

Silent.

“What?”

“Alberto supposed to have a free period and planned to walk his dog this morning. But Professor Guardiola thought it was a good idea to announce that he re-scheduled his class half an hour before said class started. Alberto didn’t want to disappoint his dog and decided to call Emre and asking for a favor, saying it was considered as the third quest and flew to his class without waiting confirmation from a dumbfounded Emre. Then, Emre called me to accompany him in order to just be there in case there something happened to Alberto’s dog. So, I spent this morning babysitting both Emre and Alberto’s dog.”

Adam blown out laugh until his face was red and he had a trouble breathing. “That’s ridiculous!”

“I know you won’t believe it. But that’s the truth. I asked myself what did I do wrong to deserve that.”

Adam laughter was subsided and he looked at Jordan with wonder. “You’re reliable. That’s why everybody count on you.”

Jordan scoffed. “That’s not true.”

“It’s true and you don’t have to be so modest about it.” Adam insisted and Jordan shrugged his shoulder, faint blush covering his face. “Aww, is that Adam Lallana complimenting me?”

Adam punched Jordan shoulder and snorted. “Don’t get used to it.” Jordan laughed and they fell into a comfortable silent. Adam starting to pick on the grass and exhale loudly. Jordan looked at him with concern and cleared his throat. “You seem to have a lot of things going through in your mind.”

Adam sighed and shook his head. “It’s just I keep thinking about Dele and Eric, and Kroos and Rodriguez too. I mean, I know their problems isn’t mine to concern, but I don’t help to worry, and sad too. It’s weird.”

“It’s not. Weird, I mean. It means you care about them. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“You really think so?”

“Yeah, Ads.”

“At least I want to help Dele and Eric, but I don’t know how.”

Jordan kept silent for a little while and Adam thought he must make Jordan uncomfortable what with talking about other people problems. But then Jordan spoke thoughtfully and Adam couldn’t help but feeling fondness towards him. “It’s harder to help them as the problem is indeed between them. It’s the matter of their relationship and nobody knows better than them. We could give an advice or assure Alli -for example- that Dier wouldn’t leave him, but it wouldn’t really help. They have to listen and talk to each other just so their minds would be at ease. Maybe what we could do is help them face each other just so they could talk about their problem.”

Silent.

“You said ‘we’.” Adam stated with astonishment. Jordan looked at him and frowned. “Pardon?”

“You said ‘what we could do to help’. Are you saying you’re gonna help me kick their asses?” Adam repeated. Jordan shrugged. “If you want to.”

“Of course I want to. You don’t know how stubborn they are. I need more than one back up to be honest.”

“We can ask Studge, or Lucas, or everybody else to help.”

“Damn Hendo, I could kiss you right now.”

“W-what?”

“Come on, let’s get help. The sooner the better.”

Jordan was left dumbfounded as Adam hurriedly left, too excited to notice his previous words and the effect it has for the younger man.

\---

“Xabs, do you hear the _newest_ news?”

Xabi Alonso looked up from the paper he was currently marking and saw a very unhappy Steven Gerrard in front of him.

“Pardon me?”

Stevie made a dramatic gesture with his hands, took a chair and sat in front of an oblivious Xabi. “You haven’t heard then?”

“Hear what Stevie?” Xabi started to get annoyed that Stevie didn’t blurt out whatever the newest news was. “Alli and Dier had a row because Kroos and Rodriguez broke up.”

Xabi blinked and blinked slowly. “I’m not sure I understand what you just telling me, love. Are you even speaking English?”

“Xabs, it’s ridiculous. But that’s what I heard.”

“ _You_ heard?”

“Okay, Carra told me. And don’t ask me why he knows in the first place. You know how he looks like he has a spy everywhere.”

Xabi put down his work and decided to do that later. He knew he wouldn’t get the work done either way with Stevie in front of him. “Okay, spill it. Tell me what happen from the start.” Xabi demanded and Stevie told the story with his version animatedly.

“So, it happened when the news about ‘The Big Broke Up’ spread out like a wildfire. You know how everybody ship that couple because let be honest, their story is like the one that happened in the comics or something. Come to think of it, they’re not too different, aren’t they?”

Xabi frowned. “What do you mean Stevie?”

“Both Kroos and Rodriguez have the same calm nature, and it’s not like they’re too opposite attract, right?”

Xabi shook his head fondly. “I don’t know where are you going with that, Stevie.”

“Right, I’m spiraling out of topic here. Okay, so the news. Apparently, Alli and Dier have a different perspective regarding the reason of why Kroos and Rodriguez broke up.”

Xabi frowned and stared at Stevie with calculated eyes. “They broke up because Rodriguez will move to Germany.”

“I know. But that’s not good enough reason to split up–“

“That’s a reasonable reason and I don’t see what’s wrong about that.” Xabi interrupted. This time, Stevie was the one who frowned. “What do you mean by that?”

Xabi shut his mouth silent and fidgeted under Steven’s scrutinized eyes. There’s an uncomfortable silent until Stevie’s soft voice break it. “Is that why you decided to leave me that one time?”

“Stevie, no. It’s nothing to do with that- “

“Is that how you see me? An obstacle in your way while you try to achieve your dream?”

Xabi stood up and pleaded to Stevie with his eyes. “It’s not like that Stevie, and you know that.”

Stevie started pacing and bit his lip repeatedly. “Know what, Xabi? We never talk about that because I just grateful that you back I don’t question why you left in the first place!”

Xabi was startled and pointedly looked at Stevie’s eyes. “You know Madrid was my dream, Stevie.”

Stevie stared back at Xabi and smiled sadly. “I know how Madrid was your dream, how explore the world _is_ your dream. I just didn’t know that you see me as an obstacle in your way. You could have told me, so I didn’t spend every day asking myself what was wrong with our relationship that you left me without even saying goodbye.”

Stevie left the room abruptly, leaving Xabi standing shell shock in his spot. Upon realizing that Stevie walked away from him, Xabi run out of classroom and only met the empty hallway.

_Why does it become like this?_

\---

Jordan and Adam were walking down the hallway when they saw Mr. Carragher and Mr. Gerrard talked heatedly. They looked at each other briefly before approached them to see what the ruckus about.

“I don’t care that you’re going to bloody Manchester, Carra! Just take me with you for awhile. I need to get out of here and think.” Stevie said exasperatedly while Carra frowned deeper. “You know I’m going to meet Neville, right? I don’t want you tag along to Manchester, for fucks sake Stevie!”

“I just need a bloody ride! You can ditch me when we arrive in Manchester!”

“No way I’m ditching you in this state. You could have gone for a week and never come back if I let you. Fine, I will give you a ride, but you take someone with you to Manchester.”

“I’m not a fucking child, I don’t need a babysitter.”

“Take it or leave it.”

“Fine! Wait for me.” Steven looked pointedly at Jordan and Adam and appeared to realize that both of them had been watching him and Carra bickering from their awkward pose and the guilty looked on their faces.

“Hey, lads. Have a class this afternoon?”

Jordan and Adam looked at each other with confused expressions. “Eh, no. We’re free this afternoon.” Jordan replied cautiously while Adam just shrugged his shoulders.

“Great! We’re going to Manchester this afternoon then. Let’s go.” With that, Steven sauntered off without waiting their agreement, leaving both Jordan and Adam gaped at him. Carra looked at them with pity and patted their shoulders. “Please keep him company while in Manchester lads. He’s both angry and wounded, and he tends to do stupid things in this state.”

Understanding dawned on Jordan and he nodded. “You don’t have to come if you don’t want to, Ads.”

Adam looked at him and shrugged. “It’s okay. I will come with you. I’m worried about Professor Gerrard too.”

“Wonderful. Let’s get going before Xabi finds us.” Carra ushered both his pupils hurriedly to the parking lot and ignoring their question about why Professor Alonso couldn’t see them. Stevie had already sit in Carra’s car and they hurriedly got in the car and took off. Carra looked briefly at Stevie and cleared his throat. “What happened between you and Alonso?”

“Nothing.” Stevie answered grudgingly. Carra scoffed. “Please, don’t bother lying to me, arsehole.”

“None of your fucking business.”

“Fine. Go sulking!”

Stevie kept silent and Carra sighed. This is gonna be a long ride. He looked at his pupils via rear mirror and smirked. If Stevie will sulk and ignore him all the way, he could at least entertain himself with Jordan and Adam. “So lads, how’s your relationship going?”

“Rela- what?” “What’s relationship? We don’t-“

Carra smirked seeing both of them stuttered and laughed out loud. “Your going-into-friendship-thing lads. Why are you both so nervous anyway?”

Both Jordan and Adam blushed and pretend not to see each other. Adam cleared his throat and answered nervously. “We’re doing good, so far. There’s no blood between us, if you want to know.”

“No blood spill then huh? That’s good. So, my punishment is working then?”

“You could say that.” Jordan replied. Carra hummed. “I’m not expecting you lads keep going together after the punishment is over to be honest.”

“We- um. We found out that we have a lot of thing in common, and decided to try to being friend.” Jordan continued while Adam just nodded along. Carra looked thoughtful for a seconds and smiled. “That’s good. You don’t need to rush into anything. Just let it flow like a water.”

“We will.”

“By the way, I know Dele and Eric had a row this morning.” Carra take a peek from the mirror and saw them tensed when they heard the question. “You guys don’t have to tell me what happened if you don’t want to. I just curious, that’s all.”

He could hear Stevie scoffed but decided to ignore it. Let Stevie be miserable in his own world. Jordan looked at Adam as he didn’t really know what happened either, but Adam appeared to be in deep thought and exhaled slowly. “They had a row whether they would still be together if one of them move away. Dele kind of put himself in Kroos situation and accidentaly accusing Eric that he wouldn’t care about him if someday Eric moves away and thought the best decision for their relationship is to end it. Naturally, Eric was offended and the rest was a history.”

Carra tsked and shook his head. “How could they be so stupid?”

“I’m sorry?” Adam asked as if he heard wrong but Carra just shook his head again. “Kroos and Rodriguez break up wouldn’t affect other people relationship _if_ they –when I said they I mean all stupid people who got sensitive and put themselves in Kroos or Rodriguez situation- think with their mind and not with their heart.”

Adam chuckled awkwardly. “That’s true, but… It’s easier said than done.”

Carra sighed dramatically. “You’re right, lad. It seems we will face a lot of drama for the next week.”

\---

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, how is this chapter?  
> I'll try to update faster than before.   
> Thanks again for whoever read this, give kudos or comment.  
> You guys make my day, and I hope my fic made your day too.
> 
> Happy new year and may the odd be ever in your favor!

**Author's Note:**

> How was it? Feel free to comment, kudos, or contact me  
> I'm up for chat about anything, really. :)  
> It's supposed to be a oneshot, but eh, I keep added scenes, so it will have several chapter.  
> Thank you for reading. :)


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